Friday, November 11, 2011

Jose Canseco Has A Job!

As most of you probably know, the baseball season ended a few weeks ago. The Rangers decided they would rather lose in seven games than sign Jose Canseco to their squad. Jose Canseco at DH would definitely have led them past the Cardinals, but that is their loss.

Jose's baseball season ended quite a bit before that, which led him to the world of unemployment. He tried to make a couple extra bucks by celebrity boxing against Lenny Dykstra, but unfortunately, Dykstra backed out and Jose was left without an opponent.

But if there's one thing that we have learned about Jose Canseco through his Twitter account, it's that he will always persevere. Sure, there are no jobs for a retired Bash Brother in southern California, so he hit the road. Jose is moving to Las Vegas. Vegas, baby, VEGAS!

What entrepreneurial adventure awaits our fearless hero? Is he playing celebrity poker? His idea of a reality show with other former MLB players? Will he be on the next season of The Ultimate Fighter? Unfortunately, none of these are the answer to the question of Jose's next adventure. Jose is, wait for it...keep waiting for it...Jose is going to be...well I'll just let him tell you:

 Jose Canseco 

Come down to the Art of Music at the Mandalay Bay Hotel Shops in Las Vegas. I'm signing autographs 6 days a week from 1 pm to 5 pm

Um, really? Shit, that was not the awesome adventure I was hoping for. That's actually kind of sad. No, it's really sad. Well, at least he's probably only doing it for a month, and then he'll get into something more awesome. Right, Jose?

 Jose Canseco 

Going to be at the Mandalay Bay in Vegas for the next year. Tuesday thru Sunday 1pm to 5 pm. Art of Music Store

Holy shit! A year? Jose, your afternoons are taken up for six days a week for the next year to sign autographs? A year? This is not the badass Jose that we have come to know and love. This is a neutered version. I blame Miss Leila. Jose has told me that she uses drugs and lies, yet Jose is back with her. She sounds like one of these:

With that all out in the open, I still have one question for my readers: Who wants to go to Vegas with me?

-Joe

P.S. Ultimate Warrior, you are still awesome, right?
 The Ultimate Warrior 

RT  thought on penn state" Fill Beaver stadium 4 PPV, unlock prison inmates to fuck Sandusky et al up ass, castrate & let die

 The Ultimate Warrior 
Yes. Paterno, too.

Oh yeah, he is.

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