Monday, February 20, 2012

Views On The Bachelor - Emily Is On The Market

A couple weeks ago, my girl Jamie was eliminated from The Bachelor. This saddened me to such a degree that I decided to write about it and let the world know that I started watching The Bachelor and very much enjoy the show. I get to look at attractive broads and live every bit of their drama with them. But as I stated before, I'm a catch, so when I watch a dating show, I have a responsibility to pick multiple women.

Hence, there was Emily. Sweet, sweet, Emily. Also, she loves to "drop it like it's hot" on the dance floor, so she could definitely hold her own with West Coast Dancing. No way could Ben be stupid enough to eliminate both my girls in back to back weeks. But alas, Ben's stupidity knows no bounds, and he eliminated fair Emily on the episode last week.
Emily's got it going on. Beauty, brains (getting her Ph.D.), and butt stuff (dancing), but the main reason that Emily stands over other bachelorettes is that she loves to rap. A hot chick who likes to bust rhymes, sign me up.
Anybody who can put epidemiologist in a rap is a keeper. Shit, considering most of the girls I have seduced in the past, a girl that could pronounce epidemiologist would have been a keeper.

Why did Ben eliminate her? I have no clue. There was no signs that this was going to happen, so I will stick with my original theory that Ben is very gay and a few of the girls are packing heat downstairs. That is the only logical reason to get rid of a girl like, Emily, and keep a girl, like the evil, manipulative, Courtney. God, I hate Courtney. Her nose is too small for her face, and when she got the final rose over Emily, this happened:
In the words of my rapping buddy, Peck, "Fuck that bitch."

But don't worry, Em, I'm here for you. You and Jamie are still the girl(s) for me.

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