Thursday, October 11, 2012

That NFL Quarterbacks Facebook Chat Is For Mouth Breathers

This piece of shit has been making the rounds on the Internet. I knew I shouldn't have clicked on it, because I have only seen it from people who are too stupid to have a sense of humor. I'm not going to take the time to break this down, as that would add humor and creativity to a piece that does not deserve it. Rarely can I not make it through a short internet article, but reading that would be considered torture too extreme for Abu Ghraib.

I can't believe people enjoy it, because there is not a single clever thing about it. None of the quarterbacks have a distinct voice. It's just, "You suck."and "Nuh uh, you suck." Every quarterback sounds exactly the same. There is no art to it. If you want to read something worthwhile, check out this guy who tweeted his acid trip. It's beautiful.

If you make the quarterbacks have distinct voices, it has the potential to be funny, but this isn't even satire. They're not making fun of anything; they're just throwing out some basic facts and opinions about quarterbacks while putting famous QBs names next to childish text. I cannot believe how many people I have seen share that link like it's some sort of genius thing.

If you enjoy that, you are a god damned mouth breather. Seriously, you need to evaluate things. I'm sure you probably think you are a normal, well-adjusted person, you are probably wrong. There is a good chance you suffer from a mental disability. I don't know if my blog is the best forum to tell you this, but seek help. Yes, occasionally normal people spill food on their shirt, but it isn't normal for you to shit your pants daily, and if you thought that was funny, I cannot imagine you have a good handle on your bowel movements.

So, please, seek help...and a toilet, because the shitting your pants is getting out of control.

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