Thursday, December 6, 2012

I Don't "Get" The Victoria's Secret Fashion Show

I don't get the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. Now, to most people, that comment makes me sound retarded, and if history has taught me anything, it is that me being retareded is always a very real possibility. Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. Most of you are probably thinking, "Hey, Hott Joe, it's hot chicks in lingerie, what's not to love?"

And I understand that. But, with the internet, I can see hot chicks in lingerie at any time that I want. I can see hot chicks with no lingerie at all. That's right; there's naked chicks on the internet. In fact, I don't have the mental capacity to think of something that I would want to see a woman doing that I could not find on the internet.

Could I find women dressed up as clowns having sex with a priest? For sure. Could I see a woman having sex with any animal? Probably, but these are not things I want to see, because these are the types of things that a person cannot unsee.

In porn, are the women as beautiful? Well, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but no, they are not. Even the best in the biz have a snaggle tooth or recent black eye. But I can watch these women do unspeakable things, and I can do it ANY TIME I PLEASE. I have to wait once a year to see a lingerie fashion show with better looking women, but that payoff doesn't quite seem worth it.

The strongest argument is that a little mystery can be sexy, but I'm going to be honest with myself. I'm never going to see a supermodel naked in person. It's just not something that is going to happen. It's not something that I have ever really aspired to have happen, so I'm okay that I'm probably past the point where I can get myself into a wacky enough situation to conjure that one up.

What I'm trying to say is fuck mystery; show me the whole kit and caboodle. In conclusion...

Porn > Lingerie Fashion Show

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