Quick Thoughts: Sports Edition

Is it bad that I have no clue when the World Cup starts? I know it's soon, because there's been a lot of hype about it lately. But I usually rely on ESPN having a countdown when I watch it, but I don't have cable at my place so I've avoided that. I'm not a soccer fan at all, but I do have fond memories of the last World Cup. I remember going to Omaha for the College World Series and skipping the day game to go to a church that had kind of become a bar and watching the World Cup on a 13 inch TV with my buddies and a bunch of soccer hooligans who chose to wear the American Flag instead of t-shirts. Now that's a fashion statement I can get behind.

I have grown up rooting for Chicago sports teams, but as much fun as it would be, I really can't claim to be a Blackhawks fan. If you asked me who my favorite team is, I'd probably say the Blackhawks. But if you asked me who my favorite player on the team is, I'd probably say Jeremy Roenick. I guess that I wish the Blackhawks good luck, but unless it goes to a Game 7, I'm probably not going to see a minute of the games.

Speaking of Chicago sports teams, how fucked are the Cubs? Really fucked? Extremely fucked? Unbelievably fucked? If everything broke right for them, maybe (and I stress maybe) they could be competitive in 2013, but they've got a lot of old guys with expensive contracts and the farm system is okay on pitching and bare when it comes to hitting. I liked Josh Vitters going into the season, but he's got the Corey Patterson approach of "If the pitcher is going to go to all the trouble of throwing a ball near the plate, I should at least have the common decency to swing at it." Their only hope is that the rest of the division sucks, and maybe an 83-85 win season can win the division.

How bad is it that I'm more excited for Iowa basketball than I am for Iowa football? Maybe this offseason is starting to wear on me, but the more I think about the football team this year, the more I've convinced myself that this year could be a massive letdown. The schedule is set up nearly perfectly for them, but it's got a lot of games where the Hawks could slip up. Going on the road for a night game early in the season just seems like a really bad idea. Wisconsin, Penn State, Ohio State and Michigan State are all at home, but this isn't the same Hawkeye team that dominated at Kinnick. Plus, road games against Michigan and Northwestern are still very scary for this squad.

But then I get to thinking more. Iowa dominated Arizona a lot worse than the score showed, and the Pac-10 is weak as shit. Iowa dominated Penn State and Wisconsin last year on the road, and although Wisconsin returns a lot of guys, Scott Tolzien does not put any fear in me. We beat Michigan State and took Ohio State to overtime with a backup QB, and Iowa's D-Line may make Terrelle Pryor quit football. Northwestern's a bunch of ass clowns who hurt a US hero, Ricky Stanzi, so he will no doubt get revenge on those pussies. And Michigan may have a Bud Kilmer moment sometime this season and try to play without a coach. Yes, it worked with with Lance Harbor coaching the team, but Tate Forcier is no Lance Harbor, and Denard Robinson is no Jonathan Moxon (During the James Vandenberg era at Iowa, I probably heard "Mox is a fox" about 375 times).

Have a great weekend everybody, and I'll be back in D-Port late Wednesday, and I'll be in town the following two weekends. Hit me up if you want to party.

-Joe

P.S. Don't even try to take off La Parka's mask. This dude's just lucky he didn't have a chair.

For your health!