1. Donna Paulsen - Donna bought a new dress to impress Huntley. She unjammed a copier by bumping her ass against it. She's basically The Fonz. Donna skips Daniel Day-Lewis in a kilt to get her freak on with Huntley. She also gets to use double entendre and hidden meanings with Huntley, which, for her, is like receiving cunnilingus. So good for you, Donna. Sure, you got yelled at by Harvey, but that will only push you to do what's best for you instead of worrying about his interests. A Donna out for herself is number one Donna in my book.
2. Harvey Specter - Harvey runs. Ladies have a double take when Harvey runs by. He takes Louis down a peg by doing whatever he wants when it comes to Hessington Oil. Then he goes Big Dog by taking Jessica down a peg by letting her know that Darb-Diggity has his back in this case. He of course makes every correct decision along the way, but Jessica and Louis go behind his back and mess everything up. The merger case isn't really his, but Harvey surprisingly did not get what he wanted, which is very rare.
3. The Assistant - Straight up owns Louis by letting him know that they were way ahead of him on his plan, because apparently Wharton is better than Harvard. After owning Louis, you know this guy was about to treat himself to some hookers with rockin' chest beefers that would make even Karl Welzein jealous. That's a power move.
4. Stephen Huntley - Huntley does a classic move by hitting on Rachel to make Donna want him more. This man has clearly read The Game and prescribes to the Mystery Method. He then signs up Donna to be his sex assistant. She propositions him for sex, and he proves that he is nowhere near the level of Harvey. He called a taxi. A taxi? Harvey would have had his driver already waiting, because he would have known he was about to be propositioned for sex. Also, he wasted a lot of money on those tickets by not going to the show. I wouldn't waste a $6 matinee movie ticket for sex. Tell the lady to cool her jets for a while, and you can get down to business later. Sex can wait, my third viewing of Fast Six cannot.
5. Mike Ross - Mike uses his crappy British accent to trick a reporter into missing his exclusive interview with Ava. Something I have noticed is Mike Ross is the worst lawyer ever if he is by himself. Literally, every great idea that he has ever had while lawyering has been due to the fact that he was talking to someone else. They talk about something completely random and the idea pops in his head. This man should not be working alone, as he is really just wasting everyone's time as he memorizes documents. He also tells Rachel that he loves her, but that's just what losers do to make themselves feel better.
6. Edward Darby - Hangin' in Toronto, and putting Jessica in her place. She said she was concerned about money with Hessington Oil, but he points out that she wasted company money by flying to Toronto when she could have just called. That's a good burn, Darby. Still, Jessica left him with his dick in his hand after she screws over Ava Hessington for the good of the firm.
7. Louis Marlo Litt - Louis power walks. Ladies ignore Louis. He tries to do things behind Harvey's back, but Harvey has set up Harvey only lanes throughout New York City, so he can stop anything. He then tries to get Jessica to go behind Harvey's back, but she refuses. Louis "Litt Up" Harvey by taking full control of the takeover case. Louis got the board to agree to boot Ava, but then he has a change of heart when he finds out that Ava is innocent. Still, Jessica tells him not to stop what he has already done, so he lets it happen like a total pud.
8. Jessica Pearson - Jessica tries to assert her control over Harvey but instead gets completely owned by him when she realizes that Darby is the man who is in charge of the law firm. On top of that, Louis calls her out for no longer being in charge. Wait, wait, wait, on top of THAT, Darby then puts her in her place about her not being in charge. She then decides that it is time for her to stop playing by the rules, and she lets Louis do what he must to keep Hessington Oil as a client. Jessica no longer cares about innocence, she just wants to do everything she can to keep the billables for Hessington Oil. She triumphantly walks away from Darby when he confronts her on things, but she got shit on throughout this entire episode until the end, so it is tough to put her too high in the rankings.
9. Katrina Bennett - If she was less attractive, Louis would be in love with her. Unfortunately, she's traditionally pretty. She gave Mike credit for their idea to make a truce with him, and it seems like those two are finally getting along. She still got put in her position by making a deal with Harvey and making a funny video of Mike, and it's going to take me a while to forgive her for the latter.
10. Rachel Zane - She just gossips throughout this episode and offers nothing else. At least she's pretty.
11. Ava Hessington - She wants to talk, but Harvey convinces her not to by pointing out that she is going to look more guilty than a dog with icing on its face in a missing cupcake case. Ava finally convinces Harvey and Mike that she didn't commit those murders. Unfortunately, Louis got the board to betray her, and she lost control of her company. She's innocent of the murders and still lost her company, so, yeah, it's not a great week to be Ava Hessington.
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