Black Lives Matter

I’ve had a lot of thoughts floating through my head over the last week. When the video of George Floyd being murdered by a police officer first came out, I was sickened. I wish that I was shocked, but how could I possibly be shocked by this? Instead, my only thought was, “Again?” This shit, where a police officer kills an innocent black man, happens again and again and nothing changes. 

 

This isn’t just about George Floyd. It isn’t just about the big stories like Michael Brown and Tamir Rice and Eric Garner and Trayvon Martin. I could keep going, and those are just the ones that got national attention. It’s the tip of the iceberg. And even the murders aren’t the whole story. It’s the constant harassment for the crime of being black. I know that I live in a different America than black people do, and even though I try to educate myself, I still can’t fully comprehend how much tougher a “normal” day is for them compared to me, because we have created a racist system that is designed to beat them down, physically, mentally, and emotionally.

 

So no shit there are going to be riots, and people who lament against riots are privileged pieces of shit, because you have given the black community no choice. The motherfuckers in power were too offended by people taking a knee during a national anthem. A fucking knee during a song that has no reason to even be played before a game between two teams from America. They couldn’t allow that peaceful protest, because those black people were committing the crime of making white people uncomfortable. And those in power got their way; they changed the conversation to kneeling during the national anthem as the big story where cops murdering innocent black people got moved to the back pages. 

 

So the cops were able to keep murdering them. This EXACT story happened six years ago when Eric Garner was held in a choke hold and kept gasping, “I can’t breathe,” and the cops just kept him there until they took his last breath. I mean, just take a second, no, take a minute, a full fucking minute of your day to think about that. Unless you have lost all empathy, it will make you sick. 

 

Imagine if that was you. Imagine being trapped, not being able to breathe, and pleading for those that are there to “serve and protect” to please just give you an inch of relief. And they can’t be bothered to do that, because YOU, helpless on the ground, are the threat to the four fully armed police officers. What do you think about during those last breaths? You think about your loved ones, and that you’ll never be able to see them or let them know how important they are to you. Just thinking about that as a hypothetical makes me ill. One thing I’m guessing that George Floyd didn’t bother thinking was, “Why?” Why was this happening to him? Because he already knew. He knew that a black person who makes the tiniest misstep no longer has the right to live; he has to depend on the mercy of a system that is set up to destroy him.

 

Police are murdering minorities and not even missing a paycheck. When people protest police violence, the police show up in FUCKING TANKS, start running people over with cars, and shooting tear gas and rubber bullets at point blank range. And the media tells you that it’s the people who are rioting that are the problem. Our system is broken.

 

I’ve been trying to think of ways to wrap this up, but in all honesty, I’m just sad. I’m a privileged white male, and I’m beaten down. I can’t imagine what it’s like to be black.