I Buzzed My Hair And Instantly Regretted It

There have been many changes in our daily lives caused by the pandemic. On the absolute least essential side, people have not been able to get their hair done. Of all the things to complain about, this one is rather ridiculous. The world was shut down so nobody was seeing you, and how obsessed with your fake ass look do you have to be to care about it that much when nobody sees you? I mean, I care about my body even though I never have a reason to take my shirt off, and, oh, I guess that’s why people were also lamenting not having a gym even though you don’t need a gym unless you are a professional athlete.

But back to the hair. My hair was getting long, and it was getting hot in Florida. This was no longer an appearance an issue; this was a comfort issue. Unfortunately, my wife was not a fan of me having short hair so it took some convincing before I finally got approval. You can call me names and talk about how my wife wears the pants in the family (that might be true), but this is much more a situation of I don’t care about my hair, and she does; plus she is the one stuck looking at me. So her approval set off me on a search of my garage for my old clippers. Those might be in there somewhere, but they might be thrown out when she said she would never let me buzz my head again. Either way, I ordered a new set on Amazon for $20. Since I was not very quick to come up with this brilliant plan, it took nearly three weeks to get to me, but short hair would be mine.

I was so excited when the package finally came. Once I put the little guy down for an afternoon nap, I got set up in the backyard so my old hair could spawn new mes all around Florida as it blew across the state. It felt great as I felt that buzzer and watched clumps of hair fall to the grass. I didn’t have a mirror, so I kept feeling around my head and got any spots that I may have missed. On my way inside, I caught my reflection in the window, and...it was not good. I keep my hair short, but I still realized that it was a whole lot longer than what I had just done with a 2 guard.

I came inside, and my wife gave me a three word reaction, “I hate it.” She elaborated that she hates it so much, and she didn’t want to look at me, but she still loved me. Not an ideal reaction, but not totally surprising.

When I was finally able to look in a mirror, it was worse than I thought. WAS I BALDING? There was a spot near the front middle of my head that looked like the hair was less dense than around it. I was terrified. I felt it, and it felt like the other spots, but I wasn’t sure if it was too traumatic for me to accept, and I was just convincing myself of a lie.

As I looked closer, I realized that there was plenty of hair all over my head, but there was such a concentration of gray hair that it made it look thinner than the brown hair around it. I knew that I was getting more and more grays sprouting up, but this really hammered the point home. I’m not gonna lie, it bruised the ego a tad.

My wife asked me if I was going to start coloring my hair. All I can say is not yet. I’m not saying I will never do it, but I will say it seems unlikely. It just seems like a ton of upkeep, and I don’t think I’m that dedicated to hair color. Right now, my plan is to gray naturally and eventually turn into a silver fox.

But I really need to grow my hair out again.