Wednesday, May 20, 2020

XFAlpha Breaks Down the AFC West Draft

Another week, and another conference broken down. This time we show our West coast bias and hit up the AFC West. Also, we talk a little wrestling, and how WWE wasn't that bad, but this was before I am 20 minutes into as I type, and it is very, very bad. Then it's AFC West, followed by Jonah's 21-25th states, and his list just continues to be absolute garbage.

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MITB was this past week, and I’m not sure if I would consider it good, but it at least seemed like they tried. There is a WWE style, and those matches are built for crowds, so even a very good match like McIntyre and Rollins can’t totally hit without one.
As for the MITB match, it at least tried to be something. Asuka is amazing. They realized there’s no crowd so they have to do something different, and they had cameos from people. Did it achieve humor? No, it was not funny, but it was slightly amusing, and at least they tried. WWE has so much talent that just the tiniest bit of effort makes things worth watching, and they continued that on Raw.
Becky is pregnant, and Shayna Baszler threw the most shade imaginable. But most interesting is what it means for Seth Rollins as his character took a hilariously dark turn that has me compelled to keep watching. Will it end with it being announced that Hornswoggle’s baby? Yeah, that sounds about right, but maybe not, and that’s enough to hook me in.
The IIconics are back, so you know I’m all about that lifestyle, although nontitle wins are the dumbest shit ever.
Also Charly Caruso dropped the greatest line ever about Edge and Orton having a no-stipulation match. “If this happens, it could be the greatest wrestling match ever.” I have to watch that now.


AFC West
Denver Broncos
Round 1 (15): WR Jerry Jeudy, Alabama - Pure route runner that seems to effortlessly create separation. A lot of Amari Cooper comps, but Adam Thielen might be the most fitting.
Round 2 (46): WR KJ Hamler, Penn State - He is very fast and dangerous. He also very can’t catch.
Round 3 (77): CB Michael Ojemudia, Iowa - Cornerback with good length, but he was never a game changer for Iowa. He was good on the outside, but not a shutdown corner. He’s probably more of a depth player than a quality starter.
Round 3 (83): C Lloyd Cushenberry, LSU - I don’t think it’s ever a bad idea to take an interior offensive lineman from a school that set the world on fire on offense this past season.
Round 3 (95): DI McTelvin Agim, Arkansas
Round 4 (118): TE Albert Okuwuegbunam, Missouri - If you reversed his production from freshman to junior seasons, he’s probably a second round pick based on a 4.49 40 at 256 pounds. I think Missouri was just poor at utilizing him, and I think this could be a massive steal. He’s an excellent athlete who gives the Broncos the most athletic tight ends in the league, although there is a lot of overlap in what Albert O and Noah Fant bring to the table.
Round 5 (178): LB Justin Strnad, Wake Forest
Round 6 (181): IOL Netane Muti, Fresno State - Could be a real steal as an interior offensive lineman. Had impressive play at Fresno State, and more importantly 44 bench press reps. Hell yeah.
Round 7 (252): WR Tyrie Cleveland, Florida
Round 7 (254): Edge Derrek Tuzka, NDSU
Undrafted: Riley Neal - Quarterback who wasn’t all that good at Ball State, and then he wasn’t all that good at Vanderbilt. He is 6’6” though.


Kansas City Chiefs
Round 1 (32): RB Clyde Edwards-Helaire, LSU - Can hurt you running or catching the ball out of the backfield since he had 55 catches out of the back field. The man is only 5’7” which makes my heart flutter with joy, and most importantly, when you watch LSU, defenders did not want to tackle him. He’s a damn bowling ball and fits the Chiefs offense perfectly.
Round 2 (63): LB Willie Gay Jr., Mississippi State - And I love this pick even more. Willie Gay is an absolute monster at middle linebacker, and it’s stupid he fell this far. He may not have had stats due to academic issues, but this guy can do it all on the field.
Round 3 (96): OT Lucas Niang, TCU
Round 4 (138): S L’Jarius Sneed, LA Tech
Round 5 (177): Edge Mike Danna, Michigan
Round 7 (238): CB Thakarius Keyes, Tulane
Undrafted: Lavert Hill - Cornerback out of Michigan that originally committed to Iowa. Not a full-time starter, but he still managed six interceptions in three years so he has good abilities tracking the ball. Has potential as a nickel.
Shea Patterson - Five-star quarterback who beat out Jordan Ta’amu as a Freshman. He wasn’t very good ever at throwing a football accurately, but that’s neither here nor there.


Las Vegas Raiders
Round 1 (12): WR Henry Ruggs III, Alabama - The most Raiders pick possible. This man is speed on speed on speed. He is about as explosive as it gets, and he has the best chance of turning into Tyreek Hill that we have seen in the last few years. Also, unlike many failed speed guys, Ruggs does know how to catch a football.
Round 1 (19): CB Damon Arnette, Ohio State - He’s been the bad corner on Ohio State for 3.5 years after a redshirt. Not athletic, fifth-year senior, and somehow rose up draft boards late in the process because he played an important position for a name program. I’m not a fan.
Round 3 (80): RB Lynn Bowden Jr., Kentucky - Just watch the fumbled punt and try not to fall in love. He played wide receiver, running back, and quarterback for Kentucky, and he’s probably your best bet to become a Taysom Hill like weapon for an offense. He was maybe the most fun player in college football last year.
Round 3 (81): WR Bryan Edwards, South Carolina
Round 3 (100): S/LB Tanner Muse, Clemson - He’s a super athlete for a safety, and he’s nearly 230 pounds so at linebacker he’s in some really rarefied air. No clue if he can learn to play linebacker, but physical limitations will not be an issue.
Round 4 (109): IOL John Simpson, Clemson
Round 4 (139): CB Amik Robertson, LA Tech - Just a ballhawking cornerback that backs down from no man. It’s stupid that he fell this far, even with him being undersized. I just can’t foresee a situation where this guy isn’t a productive cornerback that causes some absolute mayhem on the field. He does have limitations, but the floor is so high that this great value.
Undrafted: Madre Hopper - Southern Illinois cornerback whose name translates to Mother Rabbit. That should put some bounce in your step.


Los Angeles Chargers
Round 1 (6): QB Justin Herbert, Oregon - Reach pick that just doesn’t excite me at all. I think his ceiling is a mid-tier quarterback. Good athlete, but him throwing the football just left me completely underwhelmed.
Round 1 (23): LB Kenneth Murray, Oklahoma - Good athlete, seems like a great person as he seems to use a ton of effort in helping out his three special-needs adopted siblings, but he could be a liability in pass coverage as he just hasn’t developed those skills at all. He’s a tackling machine so he at least has that to fall back on.
Round 4 (112): RB Joshua Kelley, UCLA
Round 5 (151): WR Joe Reed, Virginia
Round 6 (186): S Alohi Gilman, Notre Dame
Round 7 (220): WR KJ Hill, Ohio State - Nice pick late as the guy can run routes, and Ohio State has been producing a lot of wide receivers who exceeded expectations once they got into the NFL.
Undrafted: Jeff Cotton - Wide Receiver out of Idaho, just gonna go out on a limb and say that Jonah has some thoughts on this guy.

Monday, May 18, 2020

Reviewing the New WWE Ice Cream Bars

WWE, years after CM Punk asked for them to come back, finally partnered with Good Humor to release WWE Ice Cream Bars.  Punk, unsurprisingly, was not one of the four superstars featured on the ice cream sandwiches. Instead, they went with John Cena, Becky Lynch, Roman Reigns, and Macho Man Randy Savage.

As a child, I remember being so excited when the ice cream truck had these, because pro wrestling and ice cream were two of my favorite things in this world. Come to think of it, both of those things are still awesome.

So when I heard they were back, I was so excited that I had to get them right away. But then I'd be at the store and totally forget about it, so it actually took me a couple weeks. But when I finally did remember, I knew it was worth the $4.19 to get four small ice cream bars.

The first one I took out had Macho Man Randy Savage on one side. Then I flipped it over, and Becky Lynch was there. That is a damn strong start for my first ice cream sandwich. I unwrapped this treat and took my first sweet bite.

It was pretty bland.

The cookie outside doesn't deliver, and the vanilla ice cream seems doesn't add a whole lot either. I ended up grabbing some chocolate chips to punch it up a bit. That made a significant improvement, but I would way rather just have good ice cream than deal with this.

Overall, I would not recommend these. I was very excited by the idea but very disappointed in the execution. Most importantly, I got no taste of nostalgia, and that was the flavor I was most hoping to savor.

Friday, May 15, 2020

WWE Is Ruining... Riddick Moss

Riddick Moss has a record for longest title reign in the WWE. That would have been an unfathomable statement just three short months ago, but he quickly got called up to be Mojo Rawley’s bodyguard, turned on him in a matter of weeks to steal away the 24/7 title and held it for a record 41 days before losing it while jogging to R-Truth.

I do respect that he not only defends the title at all times but also wears it at all times.

Moss was the greatest athlete at the WWE Performance Center due almost entirely to the Riddick Regimen which is a combination of...well, they never really let that gimmick get off the ground so I’m not sure what it consisted of. But he is one hell of an athlete.

He’s shown flashes of personality, great athleticism, but has never really put anything together in the ring. He’s fine, but nothing he does stands out. Luckily, I have the greatest idea in history for Riddick Moss and a few other guys.

Moss will be in a stable with Titus O’Neil, Baron Corbin, Mojo Rawley, Rob Gronkowski, Tino Sabbatelli, Babatunde, Dio Maddin, Cal Bloom, Dan Matha, and Omari Palmer (we lost a couple guys, but I think the WWE could bring them back with this billion dollar idea). They’ll be called The 11, and they will just talk about how nerdy pro wrestlers are and football players are better athletes and superior to pro wrestling fans in every way. Every time they win, they will do a super pose as if they just scored a touchdown. It will be aggravating and wonderful, and it takes 11 guys that nobody cares about and turns them into one of the most powerful groups in pro wrestling history.

Now that is a damn good use of Riddick Moss.


Other Wrestlers WWE Is Ruining
Aiden English
AJ Styles
Brock Lesnar
Buddy Murphy
Carmella
Cesaro
Chad Gable

Thursday, May 14, 2020

My YouTube Wormholes of COVID-19

COVID-19 has caused quite a few changes in everyday life. The grocery store is now the most exciting part of my week as it is the only reason to get far from my home. Overall, it's been great though. At first, my wife and I didn't have to go to work because we could work remotely. Then, I didn't have to go to work because I got furloughed, which, although not ideal, means that I get to fully focus on raising a one-year-old which is awesome (and exhausting). But there is some extra time for media consumption during his naps, and there is a lack of interesting things on television with the world rightfully shutting down. This has led me down some weird roads, primarily on YouTube.

It started innocently enough. I started with pro wrestling videos. Free matches and events. It started with matches from Defy that I had seen in person like Shane Strickland (now Isaiah Scott) vs. Matt Riddle (now Matt Riddle), and that led to intergender matches like Kylie Rae vs. Orange Cassidy which led me to AR Fox vs. Kimber Lee, and then things progressed to full Evolve shows. And pro wrestling led me down other paths.

YouTube kept finding my interests, so I had to watch the Iowa/Penn State wrestling dual...from 1994. I mean, it's not like I'm going to pass up a match with Lincoln McIlravy in it. Then I found out that there were about two wrestling matches every year in the 90s that some guy lifted off of Iowa Public Television and put on the web, so I watched 'em all. I was still trying to fill the hole in my heart from not having an NCAA Championships this year. It didn't quite fill the void, so I went to the hard stuff, international freestyle wrestling. Sure, I could enjoy the recent stuff from the last 15 years, but then I started going back to the 60s where I could barely follow what was going on since freestyle wrestling has had so many damn rule changes. Kurt Angle matches were a tad disappointing, but when I stumbled on Randy Lewis beating John Smith, I thought I hit the holy grail. Then I saw Lee Fullhart beat Cael Sanderson, and oh man, that was the sweetest spot. But not everything was perfect in the world of freestyle wrestling. When I made it to the mid-2000s and started seeing ball draws, I was nearly shaking with anger. I know that you probably have no idea what that means, but whatever you're imagining, I promise it is ten times dumber.

I channeled that anger in the most logical way. Early MMA events. UFC 2, oh hell yeah. World Extreme Fighting 9 including Dan Severn, Matt Hughes, Rich Franklin, and Jens Pulver, oh my god yes! After that, it was Pride, oh man, so much Pride. They're all great. Wanderlei Silva, Kazushi Sakuraba, Mark Kerr, and the crowds are truly amazing. They love the Japanese guys most, but if you go out and destroy the world in your fights, they love you almost as much.

But violence can only take you so far, so who knows what my next adventure will be...oh shit, they've got old Slamball games. My week is officially planned. Thanks, quarantine.

Wednesday, May 13, 2020

XFAlpha Breaks Down the NFC West Draft

This week, we talk about sports being back with the return of the UFC. Then we break down all of the picks from the NFC West. We conclude with Jonah states 15-20, and luckily these picks were far less egregious than Kansas making his top 15, but never forget that all of these states are somehow rated lower than Kansas.

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NFC West
Arizona Cardinals
Round 1 (8): LB Isaiah Simmons, Clemson - An absolute freak that can cause mayhem all over the field. This isn’t a jack of all trades, master of none, he might be a master of all trades. He had over 100 tackles, 8 sacks, and 3 picks last  season.  It’s stupid he fell this far.
Round 3 (72): T Josh Jones, Houston - Was very high on some people’s lists of tackles as some saw him potentially being taken at the end of the first round. Without a second round pick, this has to feel very fortuitous for the Cardinals who could definitely use some help on their line.
Round 4 (114): DI Leki Fotu, Utah
Round 4 (131): DI Rashard Lawrence, LSU
Round 6 (202): LB Evan Weaver, Cal
Round 7 (222): RB Eno Benjamin, Arizona State - Had a huge 2018 before falling off in 2019. He’s not the greatest athlete, but he has good vision, and I think he could compete with Kenyan Drake for the bulk of carries.
Undrafted: Zane Lewis - Cornerback out of Air Force so you know he’s dangerous when you let it fly.


Los Angeles Rams
Round 2 (52): RB Cam Akers, Florida State - I don’t think people understand how amazing Cam Akers was last season. 1100 yards on 5.0 yards per carry doesn’t sound like much, but this overlooks how truly awful Florida State was last year. He was the only thing they had going. He steps into a Rams situation where he immediately is by far their best running back.
Round 2 (57): WR Van Jefferson, Florida - Never produced at Florida or Ole Miss for that matter. He’s gotten a lot of positive reviews and some Cooper Kupp comparisons, but Kupp produced, even against far inferior competition, Jefferson has just never put it together on the field.
Round 3 (84): EDGE Terrell Lewis, Alabama - I remember watching Joe Burrow’s game against Alabama, and I had to stop and rewind as I asked, “Who the fuck is THAT guy?” when I watched Alabama’s defense. This guy jumps off the tape, and it didn’t matter that he wasn’t the focus, he grabbed my attention. If he can stay healthy, this is one of the bigger steals of the draft.
Round 3 (104): S Terrell Burgess, Utah -
Round 4 (136): TE Brycen Hopkins, Purdue - Athletic tight end but can’t catch.
Round 6 (199): S Jordan Fuller, Ohio State
Round 7 (234): LB Clay Johnston, Baylor
Round 7 (248): K Sam Sloman, Miami (Ohio)
Round 7 (250): OT Treymayne Anchrum, Clemson
Undrafted: Bryce Perkins - Quarterback out of Virginia that was solid but I don’t really see any future starting potential from him.


San Francisco 49ers
Round 1 (14): DI Javon Kinlaw, South Carolina - An incredible story, surviving homelessness, and he is a beast of a man.
Round 1 (25): WR Brandon Aiyuk, Arizona State - Only one year of major production. He has some fancy footwork, but needs to clean up a lot of areas. I see him as boom or bust, and I lean more towards bust.
Round 5 (153): OT Colton McKivitz, West Virginia
Round 6 (190): TE Charlie Woerner, Georgia
Round 7 (217): WR Jauan Jennings, Tennessee - Had nearly 1000 yards receiving for Tennessee last season. Not a great athlete, but he’s 6’3” and knows how to catch the football. There’s something to work with there.
Undrafted: Josh Hokit - Fullback out of Fresno State that had nine touchdowns on just 75 carries. Freshman year, he played running back and linebacker. Sophomore year, he played running back and threw some three passes, two of which were touchdowns. His junior year, he was a bigger part of the run game and took fifth place nationally in wrestling at 197 pounds. That means he had been cutting weight every year instead of bulking up. Finally, he bulked up his senior year and wrestled heavyweight, so this man has significant beef potential, and he’s basically going to kick everyone’s ass in the NFL.


Seattle Seahawks
Round 1 (27): LB Jordyn Brooks, Texas Tech - He’s fast, and if you test well, the Seahawks will fall in love with you.
Round 2 (48): EDGE Darrell Taylor, Tennessee
Round 3 (69): IOL Damien Lewis, LSU
Round 4 (133): TE Colby Parkinson, Stanford
Round 4 (144): RB DeeJay Dallas, Miami Fla.
Round 5 (148): Edge Alton Robinson, Syracuse
Round 6 (214): WR Freddie Swain, Florida
Round 7 (251): TE Stephen Sullivan, LSU
Undrafted: Anthony Gordon - Quarterback out of Washington State - the next Gardner Minshew where he outplays a highly paid quarterback...probably not. But he threw for 5500 yards and has a capable arm so he seems to at least have potential as a backup.

Monday, May 11, 2020

The Balance Between Having Fun and Being Happy

I was a damn good time back in the day. My friends will attest that I reliably came up with good ideas and had the total lack of care for consequences to provide great memories for myself and those around me.

I am not a fun person anymore. Now my friends will attest that I truly suck as the things I did a decade ago do not even come close to happening these days. You won’t find me taking shots; instead, I’ll drink nearly as much water as I consume in alcoholic beverages. I won’t be the last one partying; instead, I’ll be the first one awake. I’ll probably go for a run, because my water consumption has led to me only feeling below average instead of horrifically hungover.

In short, I suck at fun.

Young me would be appalled at this turn of events. I mean, isn’t life all about having as much fun as possible? That’s what I thought for a long time, but as I’ve grown older, I’ve learned that the effort for fun usually isn’t what actually makes me happy. Sure, for big occasions, I go hard, especially if it’s prominently day drinking, because staying up late is a real hassle especially since I don’t have the availability or the charm to bring home a young vixen.

So now I just chill. And it’s actually pretty great. It’s not exciting. It’s not Instagrammable. But it’s good. I hang with my wife, dog, and child, and all of them bring smiles to my face. It’s the simplest things that now bring me joy. Getting a single beer at a brewery with the entire family is a wild time for me these days. Usually, it’s less exciting than that. Just watching my son eat meals is amazing, because he feeds himself, he gets a tremendous kick out of feeding the dog, and then I snack on his leftovers while his Mommy cleans him up. It’s a win-win-win-win. It would mean nothing to anyone else, and it puts the biggest smile on my face.

So I have come to grips with a life that leads to few fun activities and even fewer adventures. I’m straight up boring...and happy. So I’m good with it.

Friday, May 8, 2020

WWE Is Ruining... Xavier Woods

It’s gonna be a short one today. I’m not sure if the WWE did a great job with The New Day or The New Day did a great job with the WWE (I lean towards the latter), but either way, it has been a smashing success for years.

Xavier Woods did suffer a serious achilles injury that he is still recovering from so there isn’t a whole lot he can do on the main shows, but he’s still staying active with his YouTube gaming show and their new podcast, so he’s doing a good job of staying relevant even while he’s off of television.

Ultimately, him getting healthy and rejoining The New Day is all you can really ask for. Those guys have made the WWE system work for them, and Xavier Woods has probably done it better than anyone. Good for him, and good for the WWE.

Other Wrestlers WWE Is Ruining
Aiden English
AJ Styles
Brock Lesnar
Buddy Murphy
Carmella
Cesaro
Chad Gable

Wednesday, May 6, 2020

Breaking Down the NFL Draft for the AFC North - XFAlpha Podcast

Newest episode of the podcast should be posted by now. We break down the divorce of Jay Cutler, who I found out is not the world famous bodybuilder. Then we break down the drafts of the AFC North, and Jonah gives his 11-15 best states. Download, subscribe, and reach out to us by email or social media.



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AFC North
Baltimore Ravens
Round 1 (28): LB Patrick Queen, LSU - Explosive freak at LSU that can cause absolute havoc but only one year of production.
Round 2 (55): RB JK Dobbins, Ohio State - Are we sure this isn’t the best back in the class? He ran for over 2000 yards last season, has nearly 70 catches over his career. What more do you want? I love that the Ravens are just planning on running straight through everyone. That is my jam. 
Round 3 (71): DI Justin Madubuike, Texas A&M
Round 3 (92): WR Devin Duvernay, Texas
Round 3 (98): LB Malik Harrison, Ohio State - Not much in coverage, but he can run forward at great speeds and could be a threat as a blitzer. Big and fast is always a good combo.
Round 3 (106): IOL Tyre Phillips, Mississippi State
Round 4 (143): IOL Ben Bredeson, Michigan
Round 5 (170): DI Broderick Washington, Texas Tech
Round 6 (201): WR James Proche, SMU - A dominant receiver for SMU. He had over 200 catches, over 2400 yards, and 27 touchdowns over his final two seasons there. 
Round 7 (219): S Geno Stone, Iowa - Great instincts, not great athlete.
Undrafted - Bronson Rechsteiner - Out of Kennesaw State, 35 bench press reps, 4.48 40, and oh yeah, he’s Rick Steiner’s son. He averaged over 8 yards per carry in college, threw one pass, and it was a 60 yard touchdown. 6’0” 230 pounds of pure mayhem.
Undrafted - Kristian Welch - When you start at middle linebacker for the Iowa Hawkeyes, you’re probably NFL material. You may not be great, but if Iowa has that much trust in you, it’s a really good sign. 

Cincinnati Bengals
Round 1 (1): QB Joe Burrow, LSU - Fun fact, his combine numbers are 99% comparable to Jimmy Clausen. But in reality, I think he could be even better than the former Fighting Irish signal caller. Outside of Cam Newton taking a bunch of misfits to a national title, Joe Burrow had the greatest season in college football history. He’s really good, even with his tiny hands. 
Round 2 (33): WR Tee Higgins, Clemson - Very big and productive receiver for Clemson. 25 touchdowns over the last two seasons so at worst, he can come in immediately as a red zone target.
Round 3 (65): LB Logan Wilson, Wyoming - Love the productivity but nothing special as an athlete. 
Round 4 (107): LB Akeem Davis-Gaither, App State - All over the place for App State this past year but undersized.
Round 5 (147): Edge Khalid Kareem, Notre Dame
Round 6 (180): T Hakeem Adeniji, Kansas
Round 7 (215): LB Markus Bailey, Purdue - Bailey has struggled with injuries, but when this guy is on the field, he has great instincts and can do it all. He’s a tackling machine, had 13.5 sacks over his sophomore and junior seasons, and his freshman year he had 4 picks. An ideal seventh round pick as he definitely has starter potential. 
Undrafted - Scotty Washington - WR out of Wake Forest who is 6’5”, 225 pounds. That’s interesting.

Cleveland Browns
Round 1 (10): T Jedrick Wills, Alabama - A good tackle.
Round 2 (44): S Grant Delpit, LSU - Was the LSU offense so good that the defense got overlooked? A lot of their defenders fell in the draft and Delpit does have great range although he’s not an exactly an intimidating hitter. 
Round 3 (88): DI Jordan Elliott, Missouri - May have been the only good defender on Missouri which hurts chances of impact. 
Round 3 (97): LB Jacob Phillips, LSU
Round 4 (115): TE Harrison Bryant, FAU - I don’t think he’s a good enough athlete to be an impact tight end. 
Round 5 (160): IOL Nick Harris, Washington
Round 6 (187): WR Donovan Peoples-Jones, Michigan
Undrafted - Nate Wieting - Tight End from Tight End U. Iowa really could have used one of those tight ends to stick around from the 2018 draft as it was not a strength this past season. Wieting struggled with injuries and got passed on the depth chart by a true freshman.

Pittsburgh Steelers
Round 2 (49): WR Chase Claypool, Notre Dame - If anybody is going to become an elite tight end out of this draft class, my money is on the wide receiver making the conversion to tight end. 
Round 3 (102): EDGE Alex Highsmith, Charlotte - He had 15 sacks last season. That’s a lot of sacks. 
Round 4 (124): RB Anthony McFarland Jr., Maryland - Not related to Booger McFarland. 
Round 4 (135): IOL Kevin Dotson, Louisiana
Round 6 (198): S Antoine Brooks Jr., Maryland
Round 7 (232): DI Carlos Davis, Nebraska
Undrafted - Spencer Nigh - Fullback out of Auburn with one carry for two yards. That’s a true fullback.