Wednesday, August 19, 2020

WWE Is Ruining... John Morrison

I'm a huge mark for John Morrison. He was great in WWE, did great work with Lucha Underground, Impact, and even on Indy shows where I had the chance to meet him, and he was shockingly nice. Hell, I even loved Boone: The Bounty Hunter which was just a fun action movie with limited thinking and maximum enjoyment. 

So yeah, I love John Morrison, so I would have already made him champion, had him end The Fiend's Winning Streak, and bury The Undertaker alive to end his career. These are just starting points. The WWE has not quite followed that plan. They made his return as inconsequential as possible. But on the positive side the WWE has given him a lot of screen time which he and Miz have fully taken advantage of by being entertaining and infuriating. You actually want to watch them but still hate them, because they are so over the top. Also, Hey Hey, Ho Ho is an absolute banger.

Although he and The Miz did have a tag title run, the WWE has made their tag champions completely inconsequential, especially as both The Miz and Morrison were defeated by Braun Strowman in a handicapped match, because...reasons? I don't know; WWE is exhausting. 

But Morrison has had a string of singles matches recently against Matt Riddle, Braun Strowman, and Big E. Two of them were fantastic, and one had Braun Strowman so it didn't even go two minutes. Also, it should come to you as no surprise that Morrison lost all three of those matches as well.

Since my initial plan of immediately winning everything and ending Undertaker's career is now shot, let's go with the next best thing. Right now, the world title picture is possibly the most boring thing on the planet. Both Braun Strowman and whatever iteration of Bray Wyatt is around is played out and tired. Don't get me wrong, both guys can be captivating, but right now, I would put their feud on the same level as every Lacey Evans feud. 

The good news is that Otis is lurking with Money in the Bank. I would love to see him cash in his Money in the Bank briefcase to win the title, only for Miz and Morrison to bate him into a match by doing something mean to Mandy Rose and have Morrison win the title to make his reign last less than a week. Have Miz be the underhanded manager helping Johnny Drip Drip hold onto the title, or have Morrison turn into Boone: The Bounty Hunter and arrest The Fiend for murdering John Cena. The former seems more likely, but the latter is the best case scenario.

And that is why they call him Johnny Dreambig (along with every other last name imaginable). 


Other Wrestlers WWE Is Ruining
Aiden English
AJ Styles
Cedric Alexander
Cesaro
Chad Gable

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