Showing posts with label Enzo Amore. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Enzo Amore. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 29, 2019

WWE Is Ruining... Aiden English

Aiden English is one of the most fascinating talents in the WWE. He may not be the best, but he does have a unique skill-set that could probably be greater utilized than just having him on commentary.

He’s had a fascinating journey as he went from being hated to loved in the span of one week. His singing was majorly over, but they had Big Cass battle him in singing and decide that Aiden could no longer sing anymore. Then he was part of the Vaudevillains, another team that flip flopped, as they went from good to bad guys. They seemed to get stalled out for hurting Enzo Amore, and then Simon Gotch quit, so they were no more.

So basically if Big Cass and Enzo had self destructed sooner, Aiden English might be a hugely popular champion by now. Instead he is not. Instead, his greatest run was as Rusev’s cheerleader. Rusev didn’t even win anything important while English was cheering for him. It got over with the crowd, but it didn’t actually lead to anything.

And then they turned on each other, and now English is doing commentary for 205 Live. It’s a use for his talents, but it doesn’t seem like it’s the best use for his talents. Last year, he lost over 90% of his matches. This year, it’s 100%. If he keeps working hard, he might be able to give it his all and lose 110% of his matches in 2020.

I’ve brought up this point before in other parts of this series, but Aiden English is the perfect guy to join a stable. Let him be the mouthy guy that can win matches when his buddies help out, but he’s also probably the first one to lose when you want a good guy to overcome the bad guy squad. He’s not going to lead a brand, but he’s damn useful with his mic skills and in-ring work that is definitely good enough. And the man’s singing can’t not get over, so you always have that to fall back on. He’s probably not destined for championships, although tag gold is often handed out at random, but he needs to be better utilized than this.

Other Wrestlers WWE Is Ruining
Akam

Ali
Alicia Fox
Andrade "Cien" Almas
Apollo Crews
Bayley
Big E
Big Show
Bo Dallas
Bobby Lashley
Bobby Roode
Braun Strowman
Brock Lesnar
Buddy Murphy
Carmella
Cesaro
Chad Gable

Monday, May 30, 2016

The 10 Best Things In The WWE: May 2016

Since it's Memorial Day, we're going minimal for the May WWE Rankings. Just list it out so everybody can get back to their BBQ.

10. New Day
9. Dana Brooke
8. Enzo and Big Cass
7. Seth Rollins
6. Roman Reigns
5. AJ Styles
4. The Miz
3. Kevin Owens
2. Sami Zayn
1. Cesaro

I put approximately 45 seconds of thinking into these rankings, so they are undeniable.

Sunday, May 1, 2016

The 10 Best Things In The WWE: April 2016

As the old saying goes, April showers bring May Flowers. In the WWE, the saying goes, April Shaners bring May Kaners. That's right, Shane O'Mac is going to bring back Kane to keep him in power for April. Did I come up with this opening very late at night while needing to get some sleep? You betcha, but April had WrestleMania, and the most debuts ever. It's been crazy, and this will definitely be the most competitive month that we have had in 2016.

Honorable Mention: Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson, The Vaudevillains, The Rock, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Stardust, Apollo Crews, Charlotte, Becky Lynch, Sasha Banks, and New Day. Yeah, this month was so stacked that I couldn't include The New Day. That's insane, but it was partially helped by them taking the month off. Now onto the top 10.

10. Zack Ryder (Last Month: Uh, was he even employed?)
Let us never forget his Intercontinental Title reign. It was a great moment. Scott Hall held his belt, and we learned that Ryder overcame cancer as a child. Zack Ryder is great. Woo Woo Woo, You Know It!

9. Shane McMahon (Last Month: 10)
He went through a dang table. Yeah, the rest of his match was garbage. But still, that table spot made me ill to my stomach watching him on top of the cage. That's good work right there.

8. Baron Corbin (Last Month: Feuding with midgets)
It was always just a matter of time for Baron Corbin, as the guy really started to get it once he became a heel, and he was already blessed with a frame that the WWE loves. He made an impact with his debut, winning the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal. Now he's feuding with Dolph Ziggler which is just about the best possible feud for both guys. It doesn't matter who wins, because both guys will look good for being involved in it.

7. The Miz (Last Month: Bring back Mizdow)
So we have the most stacked month of WWE greatness, and still, The Miz makes the list? Yes, and deservedly so as The Miz has quietly been kind of excellent lately. His in-ring stuff is only solid, but they're accentuating what he does well. In a ladder match, he can pop up for short periods, hit a big spot and disappear for a while, and now he just does talking where he tricks poor Zack Ryder to take the title and is a total shitheel which is perfect as everyone wants to see Cesaro annihilate him from this Earth. On top of that, Maryse is a great addition for The Miz, as him having his wife accompany him is somehow an awful heel move when done by Miz. Just a great month for him.

6. Chris Jericho (Last Month: 6) 
Bad Jericho is back, which is great for business. Let's face it, Jericho was always best as a heel, and lately, he hasn't really found a good niche as a good guy or bad guy. But he's finally found that niche as a heel who hates guys who were beloved on the independents, and it looks like he's having a lot of fun with it, so it's been fun for everybody. Jericho is still putting on great matches, and his character work has been great lately. He'll probably be gone soon, so take a moment to enjoy how great of a professional wrestler Chris Jericho is.

5. AJ Styles (Last Month: 7)
Styles has quickly adjusted to the WWE style, and he might even win a World Title in a couple days. He keeps putting on fun matches, and he has the whole crowd behind him. Is he great at speaking? No, but he doesn't have to be to still be great.

4. Cesaro (Last Month: Probably saving the world with his freakish strength)
Cesaro is another guy who doesn't have to be great at speaking to still be great, but pairing him with The Miz is a really good call. Cesaro could wrestle a broomstick and get a great match out of it, so that's never an issue, but since The Miz is such a nerd, it's easy for Cesaro to play the cool guy. Suitsaro is a character I can definitely get fully behind (almost as great as US Champion Cesaro who loved the USA but hated Americans). But Cesaro's the greatest. He should never lose, ever, and we should enjoy every day that we get to share the Earth with him.

Oh, and how awful was it that the day before Cesaro debuted his ripaway suit, The Rock ripped away his clothes to reveal his wrestling gear underneath? Damnit, Rock, you somehow unintentionally buried someone almost as well as you intentionally do it.

3. Kevin Owens (Last Month: 1)
Kevin Owens continues to be great. He was a central part of that incredible ladder match at Mania, and he has continued to be great with every interaction he has. Finally, he gets to face Sami Zayn, and, well...let's just get to the next guy.

2. Sami Zayn (Last Month: 8)
I have made no efforts to hide my love for Sami Zayn. He's wonderful, and it's great to see him on the main roster. He has fought back to take on his arch nemesis, so this is finally time for his revenge. So we all know what's going to happen? Yeah, Sami is losing. He has to lose; that's what Sami Zayn does. He makes us care and loses, and somehow we never stop caring, because, man, do we want the best for Sami. He's put on nothing but fun matches since he got moved up, and that's not going to stop anytime soon.

1. Enzo and Cass (Last Month: Realest guys in the room, now realest guys in largest room)
Enzo has been the hottest of fire on the microphone since getting promoted. They could not have done any better with any second of the opportunity that they have been given. They didn't even wrestle on the biggest card of the year this month, and they still take the top spot, and I must say that it has a lot to do with Enzo having maybe the best one-liner of the last decade, "We're like A cups, because we're real, whether you like us or not." I don't even have the words to describe how perfect that line is. Bless you, Enzo and Cass. You are the realest guys in the room.

How you doin.

Monday, July 13, 2015

Date Night at NXT Largo

I've got a good thing going with my wife where I can count going to NXT shows as date nights. She still isn't a big wrestling fan, but her interest is growing. Also, I think she has street cred with the Internet Wrestling Community as she is a bigger fan of NXT than the main roster. We recently moved, and maybe the best thing about the new place is we are eight minutes from the Minnreg Hall which hosts NXT house shows about once a month.

First off, Minnreg Hall is pretty awesome. They have a full blown concession stand with a kitchen to cook you up something fresh. Amazingly, they not only sell beer, but they are whipping up mixed drinks as well. Since I am the oldest 30 year-old around, I was not prepared for drinking, so I got two waters and unlimited popcorn for the hefty price of $3. Yeah, it's cheap as shit. Also, tickets are $10, and it's so small that the furthest back you can be is row 8. It's really fantastic.

As for the actual wrestling show, these were a few of the highlights.

First off, Elias Samson came out and has a gimmick of "arrogant acoustic guitar guy." I'm super into that idea, because anyone who went to college is super familiar with this guy, and he is THE WORST. I think every single person has had their game thwarted by some asshole who just wants to jam out and play girl's favorite songs. Congratulations dude, you know Wonderwall, now get the fuck outta here; I'm trying to get laid. Anyway, Samson used his acoustic guitar to talk shit about Largo, and then call out his opponent. I was convinced that this match was to get Samson over, but unfortunately, that opponent he called out was Uhaa Nation who is stupidly talented and can do things like this:
Since it was the first match of the night, they wrestled a pretty safe match, but the athleticism was easy to see, and even my wife added Uhaa Nation to her list of favorite wrestlers.

In the next match, Cassie and Jessie took on Gionna and Lina. The first three girls seem to be fairly similar to what you would expect Divas to be. Lina, on the other hand, is huge. Like, she is almost as big as her cousin, Dwayne. Yes, I am referring to Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson. Anyway, she just kind of dropped people and was bigger than them, so I didn't see much in the way of wrestling, but I think worst case is that she's a way more legit looking version of Tamina.

Mike Rallis vs. Angelo Dawkins was the most nothing match possible.

Scott Dawson and Dash Wilder took on Jason Jordan and Chad Gable. Despite not having great size, I think Gable has the most potential in the group. He has a natural charisma, and even though nobody is really showcasing their skills, Gable was very smooth in the ring, and I will always root for the guys with amateur wrestling backgrounds.

The other thing that stood out to me during this match was some 8-year-old kid chanting chickenhead at someone in this match. I'm not even sure who it was directed at, but he called all of them chickenheads. I doubt the kid knows the most common meaning of that, but I laughed pretty hard that he yelled it.

Bull Dempsey beat Tyler Breeze. I just feel like that should be pointed out, but the most important thing is they are entertaining crowds. They're doing comedy wrestling, which is not an area WWE usually does well in, but they did a good job of balancing comedy with it still making sense as a wrestling match.

Solomon Crowe took on Baron Corbin in a matchup of guys that are spinning their wheels. Crowe has more crowd support, but Corbin definitely has the greater potential of success and has gotten the far bigger push thus far. Overall, the match was fine, but they did not make a believer out of my wife.

Preston Cunningham Jr. The First came out dressed like a rich idiot and said his Dad financed the show. I thought he was a bad guy, but then former NFL safety, Sabby Piscitelli came out, and it turned out that Sabby was the bad guy, because he insulted Largo, and that is the ultimate offense for a wrestler. It was honestly very revealing in how hard it is to portray an unknown character to an audience. It takes a lot of work, and these guys have a long ways to go, but just getting in reps, seeing what works and what doesn't is important in and out of the ring.

Sasha took on Carmella, and it is fairly clear that these two are on different levels right now. Sasha has her wrestling down, as she's just compelling to watch in everything that she does. Carmella is just trying to hang in there. Sasha Banks is amazing, and I would watch her wrestle anybody right now and be fully entertained.

They ended with a Triple Threat Tag match with Blake & Murphy, Enzo and Big Cass, and The Vaudevillains squaring off. It was a good match to end on as it was just a fun match. The bad guys won, but then the good guys hit them with all of their finishers after the match to send the crowd home happy.

Overall, NXT is about the best way to spend $10 for a night of entertainment. The card went about 2.5 hours, and had I gotten there earlier, I could have gotten pictures and autographs from Mojo Rawley, Dana Brooke, and Tyler Breeze. I'm still holding out for personal hero, Norman Smiley, but that'll have to wait for another day.

Oh, and NXT is so awesome that you can use it as a date night and have your significant other entertained even if they couldn't give two shits about pro wrestling. That's quality right there.

Monday, March 16, 2015

Another Date Night Watching WWE NXT

It had been a while since I had treated my wife to a wonderful evening of watching pro wrestling, so it was time for us to go to another NXT house show. Tickets are $10 for general admission, so it is an incredible deal, especially considering that general admission means rows 3-5. Also, even though my wife doesn't really care about professional wrestling, she enjoys watching me, as I do morph into a 12-year-old who has a permanent smile on my face while watching live wrestling. I'm lucky to have found someone who finds it cute and charming instead of sad and pathetic.

Let me just start by saying that I failed yet again to get a picture with Norman Smiley. I truly suck at this, as I saw him out of the corner of my eye as he was walking by and I was giving my ID to get my tickets. I should have just stopped what I was doing to achieve the goal, but I froze, and I never got another chance to express my gratitude to the man who invented the Big Wiggle. I suck, and I must find a way to make this happen.

As for other former superstars there, nobody of note...oh, except Mick Foley was randomly there simply as a spectator. He just sat in the front row by the entrance and watched the whole event. He did nothing during the event and was simply there to watch these guys wrestle.

But let's get to the wrestling with a quick match by match recap.

Anna Brock vs. Bailey
I had never seen Anna Brock before, but she's got some guns on her, and she flexes them a lot. Like that may be the extent of her gimmick, check out my muscular arms. Considering she must be fairly new, it's not too bad of a gimmick, because she does have the arms to pull it off. Bailey was Bailey, who was pretty solid and won the match with a Belly-to-Bailey suplex.

Chad Gable vs. Solomon Crowe
Chad Gable is fairly new, but he has some potential as a legit wrestler who can incorporate that into his pro wrestling. He was fairly entertaining, but the biggest takeaway from this match was that Crowe got rid of his really shitty splash finisher in favor of a submission.

Steve Cutler vs. Baron Corbin
Steve Cutler is a military guy, so you would think he was the good guy, but he came out to metal music, and posed more as a bad guy. He was kind of Lance Storm-esque in persona, but he ain't there with in-ring skills. Baron Corbin took a little offense before powering up and ragdolling Cutler.

Big Cass and Carmella vs. Marcus Louis and Devin Taylor
This was my wife's favorite match, as she was a huge Carmella fan and Devin Taylor lasted one episode on this year's Bachelor. The latter makes sense, but the former really confused me. But my wife is all in on Carmella and also likes Big Cass and Enzo Amore as they have fun sayings and they were 100% over with the crowd. From a personal standpoint, this was the moment where it hit me how gigantic wrestlers are. Marcus Louis is an above average sized wrestler, but he's not considered huge, but he was standing in the corner near where we were sitting, and let me tell you, that dude is huge. He is a massive human being, and sometimes people forget how big wrestlers are, even the guys who aren't considered that big. Unfortunately Taylor and Louis were S-A-W-F-T, SAWFT.

Ty Dillinger vs. Hugo Knox
Ty Dillinger has a new gimmick where he comes out after matches and rates them on a scale of 1-10. He considers himself a perfect 10. Who is Hugo Knox? Hugo Knox is probably my new favorite wrestler. He is a Manchester, England club dancer who has stupid tattoos, polka dot trunks and LOVES to West Coast Dance. Is he good in the ring? No, not really. But the more important question is whether he is totally awesome, and the answer to that one is a definitive yes. Dude danced so hard. He won the match and danced some more. I cannot wait for Hugo Knox to debut on television.

Mike Rallis vs. Bull Dempsey
Who is Mike Rallis? Not sure, honestly. Who is Bull Dempsey? A fat guy with a mean streak. This match happened. It wasn't terrible, but outside of Dempsey hitting his flying headbutt, nothing memorable happened.

Alexa Bliss Vs. Becky Lynch
I remember this being one of my favorite matches of the night. It was a good back and forth match with some of the few rare finishes that I was actually buying. Becky Lynch got the win, because poor Alexa can't get wins on sparkles alone.

CJ Parker vs. Hideo Itami
CJ Parker is who he is. He's fine in the ring; his gimmick is mildly entertaining, and he's basically in the same place he was two years ago. Hideo Itami was a guy who came in with a lot of hype due to being one of the biggest stars in Japan, but he hasn't really been all that impressive so far from what I saw on NXT. That being said, Hideo Itami is AWESOME in person. His style was really cool to see up close, and I finally get why people were so excited about him. Eventually, he is going to start using the GTS, and people are going to freak out. Needless to say, I am fully on board the Hideo Itami bandwagon.

Itami is great, but he's still no Hugo Knox.

Friday, October 25, 2013

Please Start Watching NXT

Please start watching NXT. You can watch it for free on Hulu. I notice the episodes on Thursday mornings, but maybe they come out earlier than that. NXT is the best show the WWE produces. It is made up of wrestlers you have likely never seen before (unless you actually like independent wrestling, which very few people are aware of), and it has appearances by guys on WWE's main roster. It's awesome. The storylines make sense, and the matches are way better than Raw (excluding matches from The Shield, Ziggler, Cesaro, Daniel Bryan, and honestly, Randy Orton lately). I can't tell enough people about Antonio Cesaro vs. Sami Zayn in a 2 out of 3 falls match from a couple months ago. Click on this, go to right after the second to last commercial break (it's about 19 minutes left) and watch the match of the year. Seriously, the only that isn't awesome about this match is Alex Riley on commentary. Sami Zayn has followed this up by having awesome matches with Jack Swagger, El Local, and Bo Dallas. If you start watching NXT, Sami Zayn will become one of your five favorite wrestlers.

Outside of Sami Zayn matches, which are all awesome, the other best thing about NXT is Bo Dallas. That's right; I'm a Boliever. This is one of the greatest gimmick alterations the WWE has ever performed. Bo Dallas was basically John Cena where he was a good guy who was always positive and people despised him for it. The beauty of NXT is it is almost entirely made of the snarky WWE fans (I am one of these people). What Bo Dallas initially did was try to ignore things, but now he has become a delusional character who hears boos as "Bos," and basically everything he says now is brilliant. He is now the guy that everybody wants to punch in the face, and I love him for it.

The worst thing in the WWE is CJ Parker. He is a hippie who doesn't quite understand how to be a hippie and snaps in and out of character with no rhyme or reason. But that's the beauty of NXT, everyone that you feel should be hated is actually hated. Everything about CJ Parker is geared to get a positive reaction, but everyone who goes to NXT shows hates CJ Parker.

He's feuding with Tyler Breeze, who is Wrestling Zoolander. I see I have piqued your interests. Enjoy this video:

Yeah, he constantly takes selfies, and he's just a really fun character. He also beats CJ Parker all the time which is also very enjoyable.

Speaking of ridiculous things that make me happy, Enzo Amore and Big Cass are also fantastic. I am working on memorizing this speech for every job interview that I have:


This is one of my favorite promos of the year:

I cannot wait to tell somebody that they don't eat hard tacos, because they are S-A-W-F-T SAWFT!

And there is also Renee Young who has started showing up on the big shows but is even more wonderful on NXT. She does commentary occasionally and the only one who can keep up with her is William Regal. She could easily be to wrestling what Doris Burke is to basketball, which makes her the opposite of what Pam Ward is to college football. Also, she's pretty easy on the eyes as well.

I could easily keep going on this, but I really want people to start sharing in my love of NXT. Right now, all I have are the weekly recaps from Brandon Stroud on Uproxx (which are excellent). So please start watching, and I will gladly share thoughts on Aden English, Alexander Rusev, Kassius Ohno, Mojo Rawley (Stay Hype), and anybody else.

NXT is the best. Please start watching it.