Thursday, May 28, 2015

20 Free Cards Against Humanity Cards

People love Cards Against Humanity. Every time I'm around and somebody busts it out, you'd think Justin Bieber just entered a 14-year-old's birthday party. People are pumped, and honestly, that's great. Anything that brings that much joy to adults is a good thing. I had a good time the first time I played. My issue is that after the first time, the novelty really wore off, as the shock factor was gone. And it is expensive to make it feel like the first time. Just to start out with the game, it costs $25, and then it is $10 more if you want some extra cards. I don't know about you, but I don't have an extra $10 just laying around (oh, you do? Well, congratulations Mr. and/or Ms. Fancypants, but even rich people like saving money), so I decided to show a little hustle and DIY this mission and make my own cards.

Here is my list of 20 Cards Against Humanity Cards that should be a great hit with your friends.

Celebrity Edition
Putin's Poontang
Hitler's Taint
Mussolini's Butthole
Stalin's Twisted Testicles
Having sex with Osama bin Laden's gunshot wound.
An All-Obama Orgy
George W. Bush's Bush
Bill Clinton's Drippy Dong
A Drink From Bill Cosby
Hulk Hogan's Sex Tape

Random Provocative Ideas
A dolphin ejaculating so hard that it breaks your neck.
Bearly Legal (Bear Bestiality Porn)
Ejaculating Robitussin
Putting honey on your nutsack and dipping it into an ant hill.

Steel Panther Expansion Pack (These are just titles of Steel Panther songs)
Bukkake Tears (Side tangent: I know there is already a card with Bukkake, and I get really irritated when, in literally every game I play, people pretend to not know what that is. I explain it, and they ask me how I know about it. Uh, because I've been on the internet, and literally a quarter of pages on the world wide web involve it. Tangent over)
Eatin Ain't Cheatin
Fucking My Heart in the Ass
Gangbang at the Old Folks' Home
Weenie Ride

This list took me about five minutes to come up with, and a lot of that was just the time it took to type it. There is no need to pay for new cards. Just make them on your own; I didn't even tap into religious figures and stuck mostly to famous political figures, where you can use people with any sort of fame and put another word for genitalia next to it. This ain't rocket science, folks. Now let the good times roll.

1 comment:

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