Thursday, December 14, 2017

The 45 Most Important Players to the Chicago Bulls Dynasty - #38 Joe Courtney

Joe Courtney
Joe Courtney was never a guy who would wow anyone with his statistics. Even in college at Southern Mississippi, his senior year only led him to scoring 8.6 points with 5.3 rebounds per game. But what he lacks in per game stats, he more than makes up for it with the fact that he has played for a lot of different basketball teams. I mean A LOT of different basketball teams. I was going to write them out, but that seemed like an incredible pain, so here it is from Wikipedia:

1992–1993Sioux Falls Skyforce
1993Rockford Lightning
1993Chicago Bulls
1993Golden State Warriors
1993–1994Phoenix Suns
1994Milwaukee Bucks
1994–1995Mexico City Aztecas
1995Cholet Basket
1995Rockford Lightning
1995–1996Cleveland Cavaliers
1996–1997Quad City Thunder
1997Philadelphia 76ers
1997La Crosse Bobcats
1997San Antonio Spurs
1997Fórum Valladolid
1997–1998Rockford Lightning
1998Idaho Stampede
1998–1999NKK SeaHawks
1999Cincinnati Stuff
1999–2000Panteras de Miranda
2000–2001Idaho Stampede
2001Krka Novo Mesto
I counted 22 stints with 20 different teams. And that doesn't even mention that he went to two schools for college. Joe Courtney got around.

Like many of the early names on this list, Courtney was signed for the 1992 preseason before being released before the season began. But he showed enough for the Bulls to bring him back in January of 1993 and signed him to a ten day contract.

He actually ended up getting two ten-day contracts. Why did the Bulls give him that extension? Well, it probably had something to do with this:
Courtney would end up playing five games for the Bulls over that 20-day stretch, and he was pretty solid, accumulating 34 minutes of action, accumulating 11 points, 2 rebounds, 2 steals, an assist, and a block. He also managed 9 fouls, but at least he made an impact.

Unfortunately, the Bulls were done with him after those 20 days as the Bulls decided not to keep him around for the rest of the season. But things worked out well for Joe. First off, you should definitely check out his YouTube page. Don't watch the self-help videos, but do watch that he posted every single highlight of his NBA career. It's awesome, because I would do the exact same thing if I had played in the NBA. Also, probably more importantly, he started a business in Scottsdale, AZ and even wrote a self-help book. Joe Courtney got around, but it seems like he settled into a pretty good place.

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Wednesday, December 13, 2017

Iowa Wrestling: Who Has The Best Shot At A National Title in 2018?

Wrestling season is finally upon us which means we are just four months away as I stand alone on a mountain, screaming at the top of my lungs that you should be watching March Matness instead of March Madness. Again, nobody will hear my screams. Iowa lost a lot of talent from last year's roster, so they are more in a rebuilding mode, but it is Iowa, so it's not like they aren't going to be incredibly good. Do they have a realistic shot at winning the team title? Well, that depends, is it realistic to expect both Penn State and Ohio State (and possibly Michigan) to all miss weight at the national tournament? If so, they definitely have a shot at the team title.

But I'm going to focus on the individuals today and go through who has the best shot at making an impact on a national level. We'll start at the bottom and move our way up to the Hawkeye that will lead this team to glory.

10. Justin Stickley - 125
This is the biggest wildcard on the team. At wrestle-offs, he dominated Perez Perez, so he really couldn't have looked much better without getting pins in his matches, but that isn't a ton to go off of. This isn't a super loaded weight class. I think everything went right for Darian Cruz at the NCAA Tournament, and I don't really see him as a threat to repeat. The two real studs this year are Nick Suriano of Rutgers and Nathan Tomasello of Ohio State. Stickley doesn't appear to have the horsepower to be a threat, but I do think he will get better as the season goes along. But he's got a lot of ground to make up if he even wants to qualify for the tournament.

Of course, that all changes if Spencer Lee burns his redshirt and wrestles this season. Spencer Lee is a SPECIAL wrestler. He lost one match during his high school career, and that was with a torn ACL against Austin DeSanto, who has been tearing things up at 133 this year. If he does wrestle, he's top-4 and without a doubt, a threat to take him the National Title. He dominated the UNI Open this past weekend and just off that, I'd probably put him at #2 or #3 on this list, and that may be too low.

9. Paul Glynn or Philip Laux - 133
The bad thing about this team is that it's going to be tough for Iowa to have an individual champion this year. But the good thing about this team is that it has no notable weak spot. I fully expect Iowa to qualify guys at all ten weights, and it's pretty reasonable to think that all of them could even be seeded. Philip Laux has been a solid backup for Iowa the past couple seasons, but he never really shined. Paul Glynn beat Laux in the wrestle-offs, but then lost to a guy that Laux beat at the Luther Open. Since then, Laux has seemed to take over the weight class. Both of these guys should be tough, but neither will provide much of a ceiling for this weight. I can see a few wins at the tournament, but I don't see All-American status for the Hawkeyes this year.

8. Vince Turk or Carter Happel - 141
If you would have asked me where Turk should be after the Iowa City Duals, I would have had him in the top five. Turk was injured in his first match last year and was out for the year, but he looked great early on. After that, he has stopped looking great as slow starts have doomed him in recent matches. The issue with this weight class is that it is very deep, but there aren't unbeatable monsters at this weight. Dean Heil always finds a way to win at the top, but everyone else is in that same grinding, close decision style. If Turk can grind with the best of them, he could pull some upsets and find himself wrestling in the quarterfinals on Friday morning. The floor is very low as it wouldn't be shocking if he went 0-2 and was eliminated from the tournament, but I think he has the potential to at least win a couple matches this year.

7. Cash Wilcke - 197
This may seem low, considering Cash Wilcke is one of the few returning Hawkeyes that competed at last year's NCAA Tournament. Not only that, he made it to the Round of 12, just one win shy of All-American status. But my expectations aren't that high for Wilcke, because EVERYTHING went right for him last year. He won so many close matches in that tournament, and had there not been an injury right before the tournament, he wasn't even going to qualify to make it. He made the most of his opportunity, so hopefully it's a sign of things to come, but he's still going to be doing his best to grind it out as an undersized 197 which is not an easy thing to do. I think he qualifies on his own merit to the NCAA Tournament, but I think the blood round is likely where his ceiling lies at this weight, and I think he'll have a lot of trouble repeating that performance.

6. Joey Gunther or Kaleb Young - 174
I'll admit that I thought Kaleb Young would take this weight convincingly from Joey Gunther, but Gunther won the wrestle-off in overtime, so he's getting the first shot at the starting gig. Both guys are wrestling up a weight class from last year where Gunther won a couple matches at the NCAA Tournament and Young had a very impressive redshirt year. I see these guys as having the potential to be ranked in the 10-12 range by the end of the season. Although on seed alone, that falls short, you never know how things may go at the NCAA Tournament, so it wouldn't be crazy to see them being a threat to be a low-level All-American this year.

5. Alex Marinelli - 165
Super recruit, Alex Marinelli, is finally ready to shine for the Hawkeyes after an impressive redshirt year last season. Still, even though his season was impressive, he did falter when taking on top notch competition. He's going to be very good this year, but 165 is stacked at the top. If everything breaks right, I could see him in the top five, but I more see him as a likely All-American, and my prediction is probably sixth for this season. The thing with Marinelli is the ceiling isn't great this season, but the floor is pretty high as he's a takedown machine who is going to be tough to upset at the tournament.

4. Sam Stoll - Heavyweight
Although this is Stoll's third year as the starting heavyweight for Iowa, we still really don't know what his potential is when it comes to the NCAA Tournament. I mean, is he going to beat Kyle Snyder, a man who is on his way to becoming the greatest American wrestler ever? No, he's not going to do that. But he could give just about anybody else a run for their money. Unfortunately, he was hurt going into the tournament during his freshman year, and an injury ended his sophomore year before he had a chance to compete at the tournament last year. I would say that he is at least an All-American this year. I think Coon will likely lock up that number two spot, but I could see Stoll anywhere from 3-6 this season. He's a big dude who can give anybody troubles.

3. Brandon Sorensen - 149
I only see one possible loss from Sorensen against anybody in the 149 pound division, but that one loss is nearly guaranteed against Zain Retherford who will likely be battling his teammate for the Hodge Trophy as college wrestling's best wrestler. I think Sorensen will be wrestling in the finals on Saturday night, but I do not see a way for him to get past The Zain Train.

2. Michael Kemerer - 157
Read above, but replace Zain Retherford's name with Jason Nolf's, and you pretty much have the same story. I give Kemerer a slightly better chance of upsetting Nolf, but the odds still aren't great. He got handled both times they wrestled last year, and even if Kemerer has improved, it's not like you can expect Nolf to stagnate. I see Kemerer making the Finals, but there is no logical way to pick him to upset Nolf at this point.

1. Pat Downey - 184
For my top spot, I am selecting a man who is not even on the Iowa Wrestling team at the moment. Downey is currently finishing his degree up at Iowa State University with the plan to be a graduate transfer for the Hawkeyes once the second semester begins. He's not technically a part of the team yet, so this is definitely a risky pick for my best chance of winning a National Title in 2018, but this is not the strongest Hawkeye team ever, so it's worth taking the risk. Pat Downey, despite being a senior, is one of the greatest mysteries in college wrestling. He started his career at Nebraska, never wrestled, and transferred to Iowa Central Community College to wrestle for a year. After that, he transferred to Iowa State where he wrestled at 197 and took fifth place, and very easily could have taken third had he not lost in sudden victory to former Hawkeye, Nathan Burak. Last year, he went 7-0 in limited action, mostly at his more natural weight class of 184, but got in trouble, and was unable to compete in the NCAA Tournament. Over the offseason, he beat Gabe Dean in freestyle but lost to the defending national champion at 184, Bo Nickal. Both Nickal and Downey are big move guys, and I really believe anything could happen when they square off. The weight class lost a ton of talent this past year, and Downey should immediately be considered a top-4 wrestler, even with a limited track record of success. At this point, there is no way to consider Downey the favorite, as Nickal has gone out and won an NCAA Tournament, but I certainly wouldn't be surprised if Downey is standing atop the podium on Saturday night, that is, of course, if he actually joins the Iowa Wrestling team. 

Tuesday, December 12, 2017

The 45 Most Important Players to the Chicago Bulls Dynasty - #39 Matt Steigenga

Matt Steigenga
So let's just start off that Matt Steigenga's story is probably going to be better than any story on this entire list. After an esteemed career at Michigan State, Steigenga was drafted in the second round of the 1992 NBA draft by the Chicago Bulls. You are probably thinking that he was a little known player during the Bulls first three-peat, but you would be wrong. Steigenga didn't get his chance in the NBA during those early years, but honestly, I'm not sure if he would have wanted it any other way.

Instead of playing in the NBA, Steigenga played for the following teams:

Tau Ceramica - Okay, nothing too special about that. It appears it was a Spanish league team.

Grand Rapids Hoops - I love the simplicity of this name. The Hoops, just naming necessary items for playing the game of basketball. I would like the Washington Redskins to finally change their name to the Washington Endzones.

Rochester Renegade - Note that this does not say Renegades, which can only make me assume that it is an homage to the 1990s classic television show starring Lorenzo Lamas.

Mitsubishi Diamond Dolphins - I love this name so much. I love that the team has a sponsor. I love that it is a Japanese league, because of course it is. And I just love sticking two words together to make an alliteration but not make any sense. That is the very definition of Japanese entertainment. Steigenga spent four years with them, so he must have loved it.

Quad City Thunder - I know this may seem like a letdown, but this is my hometown team, and it's the reason he was able to finally sign with the Chicago Bulls during the 1996-1997 season.

Since his CBA season had concluded, he went back to his home in Milwaukee. Bored, with nothing to do, he gave Bulls General Manger Jerry Krause a call to see if he could score some tickets for a Bulls game. Krause asked him to play instead. The Bulls signed him to a contract that day, and he played a couple nights later. Seriously, this story is insane.

As for his contributions, he played in a total of two games for the Chicago Bulls, he made one two-pointer and one free throw; he attempted a three-pointer but could not hit the trifecta. But that was about the only thing he didn't do on the court, as even in limited time, he managed a steal, a block, two assists, and three rebounds. Hell, he even fouled a guy. Oh yeah, and his one two-pointer was a dunk off an alley-oop. I bet you wish there was a highlight video of this, and I have a new respect for YouTube because there definitely is a highlight video of this.

Steigenga didn't make the active roster for the playoffs, but he was on the team, so instead of getting tickets for a single game in April, he sat right behind the bench for the Bulls entire championship run.

Matt Steigenga may have not played long in the NBA, but he had a hell of a career. And he's got the ring to prove it.

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Monday, December 11, 2017

I Accidentally Crashed an AIDS Race

I went for a run on Saturday morning. I wasn't too enthused about it, because the winter temps were in the low 60s, and now that I'm a namby pamby, this is stocking cap weather for me. I delayed as long as I could, but winter is here, and finally, around 9:00 AM, I made my way down to St. Petersburg to go run down there.

I found a nice little 2-hour parking spot and started off on my run. As I turned towards the water, I saw a police officer and a whole lot of runners up ahead. I decided to go in the opposite direction of the runners, and that way I would cross paths with them for a short while, but then I would clear them and be on my way.

After a few blocks, I saw that everyone was coming from my left, so I just headed straight and found a quieter stretch. Then, after a few more blocks, as I kept chugging forward, the course had apparently turned back as I was right in the middle of the damn run. There were no side streets to turn down, and I was basically just stuck.

I'll be honest. I kind of liked it. I was passing fools left and right and leaving them in my dust. There were people along the path cheering people on. Then, I ran into a conundrum. Up ahead, there were people on both sides of the road looking for high-fives. Clearly, they wanted to high-five the people that were supporting the AIDS run, not some random dumbass. But, it would be rude to deny somebody a high-five. I was cruising, so they may not even notice that I wasn't in the race, so I did the polite thing and high-fived the shit out of them. It was exhilarating.

I was at full swagger at this point as I was running real fast and taking advantage of every high-five imaginable. I decided to take it to the next level, and instead of giving somebody a high-five, I paid tribute to the nWo and The Elite and gave a woman the too-sweet sign right to the palm of her hand. That old lady was probably super confused, but I had a HUGE smile on my face.

Then the race turned down another street and I saw the finish line up ahead. It was at this time that I knew my time was done. I would likely be found out, and I also wasn't ready to end my run in less than two miles. I cut through the cone barrier and headed up another street towards my own finish line.

But the accidental AIDS run did have a positive impact on me. I would like to not only declare myself, but this entire blog, anti-AIDS...but very pro AIDS runs.

Friday, December 8, 2017

EXCLUSIVE: Interview with Former Donald Trump Advisor, John Miller

***Guest Post from Lukewarm Jonah***

We have an amazing scoop here at The Jonah Show.  I’ve managed to find John Miller, former Trump employee and secure an interview.  He didn’t want to be on tape, but graciously agreed to let me transcribe our interview.  Truly, this is a major break for us to interview someone who was very close to the now president of the United States.

Jonah: First of all, thank you so much for being here.

John Miller: My pleasure, thank you for having me.

Jonah: Let’s dive right into it, what is your relationship to President Trump?

Miller: I worked PR, public relations for him in the early 90’s.

Jonah: Just a business relationship then?

Miller: Well, a business relationship, but also a friendship.  He trusted me, he knew I was good at what I do, so he hired me in a professional manner.

Jonah: I have to ask about the famous 1991 People magazine article that got a lot of press a few months ago.

Miller: Go ahead.

Jonah: Thank you, first of all, was that you on the tape?

Miller: Yes that was me.

Jonah: You know a lot of people who heard that thought it sounded like Mr. Trump.

Miller: I can understand people hearing those similarities but it was definitely me.  I remember doing that interview.

Jonah: OK, now that we’ve got that out of the way, what about  the things you said during the interview?  Were they all true?

Miller: Well, no, not all of them.

Jonah: So you lied during the interview?

Miller: I did my job to promote Mr. Trump and in doing so said some things that weren’t exactly true.  I was a publicist, part of my job was spinning things positively, and sometimes that included embellishing certain things.

Jonah: What in particular did you embellish?

Miller: I mean, I don’t know exactly what was said and what was an embellishment.

Jonah: I’m going to go through a few claims here and you tell me whether they were true or whether they were, as you say, an embellishment.  Is that OK?

Miller: Yes that’s fine.

Jonah:  Alright, did he ever date Carla Bruni, the former first lady of France?

Miller: No, I don’t believe I ever said he did.

Jonah: Let me look here, well no you didn’t say he ever dated her but you implied that she was interested in him.

Miller: That’s PR.

Jonah: Fair enough.  The article does outright state that Madonna called and asked Mr. Trump out, so I ask you did Madonna ever call and ask out Mr. Trump?

Miller: No, they were at the same charity event and they talked and who knows what they talked about?

Jonah: But just to be clear, the part of the article that states Madonna called and was interested in dating Mr. Trump is false.

Miller: Yes, that part was embellished.

Jonah: Moving on, you talk about how well Mr. Trump is doing financially in the article.  Was that true?

Miller: What you have to understand is that when you’re a businessman like Mr. Trump, you have to portray a certain image.  I was helping him portray an image of a successful businessman.

Jonah: Are you saying that wasn’t the actual case?

Miller: Well I’m sure you’re smart enough to have done your research.

Jonah: About how he filed bankruptcy because of the Trump Taj Mahal that is mentioned in the article?

Miller: Yes, it’s all public record so I’m sure you know all about it.

Jonah: So all the talk about how well he was doing was false?

Miller: Well as I’ve said I’m sure you’ve seen the records, so no, obviously he wasn’t doing that well financially but he had an image to portray.

Jonah: You also talked about some of Mr. Trump’s exes and made some interesting claims about them.  I’d like to ask you about some of those claims.

Miller: Alright, go ahead.

Jonah: Did Ivana want to get back with Mr. Trump?

Miller: Not to my knowledge no.

Jonah: So she wasn’t calling or contacting Donald to try and get back together?

Miller: No.

Jonah: Did Mr. Trump have three other girlfriends living with him when he was with Marla Maples?

Miller: No, of course not.

Jonah: So why did you say that?

Miller: I’ve already explained, it’s PR, it’s an image.

Jonah:  Do you see anything wrong with what you did?

Miller: Not really, I was just doing my job.  PR is a complicated business and I did what I was supposed to do.  We all have to make sacrifices and choices about what we do for work.  We all do things that we don’t necessarily want to do, but need to do.

Jonah: OK, well what do you think about Trump’s situation with his press secretary now?

Miller: Well I can tell you that if I was his press secretary, we wouldn’t be getting made fun of.  I do feel sorry for some of the people who have gone through the position, especially Sean.  I know that Mr. Trump’s message can be, let’s say confusing.

Jonah: What do you mean by that?

Miller: Well, you understand that I spun certain things in a positive light.  That was my job.  The press secretary’s job is to deliver a clear message from Mr. Trump.  His message can be a little all over the place, a little disjointed.

Jonah: Go on.

Miller: The thing is, when you know Mr. Trump, and you know how to stay on message, then you can get across his point.  What Sean had to do was figure out what Mr. Trump wanted to say in a short amount of time, and the problem is his opinions change quickly.  What Sean had to deal with is delivering a message from Mr. Trump that could change.  You see, I just had to stay positive and stay on message.  Sean didn’t know how to stay positive and stay on message.  He got rattled, and to be honest his message was more complex than the message I had to deliver.

Jonah: What would you have done differently?

Miller: I would have kept things simple.  You need very basic, very general ideas.  You don’t stray from those, keep it simple.

Jonah: But these are complicated issues that he’s dealing with, and as you said Trump’s opinion, and therefore message can change in a short amount of time.  How would you deal with being sent out to say one thing, and then hours later being contradicted by Trump?

Miller: Honestly, there are things about Mr. Trump that will never change.  If you really know what’s important to him, things like his image, you can go out there and say things that won’t be contradicted.  The real problem is the complexity of the issues that these press secretaries have been dealing with.  I can go out there right now, take questions without ever talking to Mr. Trump, and be able to give passable fluff answers that I know won’t be contradicted by Mr. Trump because I know him and know what he’s looking for.  If I really got pressed on some specific issue, I’d just have to respectfully answer that Mr. Trump was looking into that issue and considering all sides.  He’s doing his research and should have a concrete stance after he’s consulted some experts.  You see if you don’t know something, you don’t want to admit that, and you don’t just want to say a stance that might change.  That makes you look stupid, and it could make Mr. Trump look stupid.  It all goes back to keeping it simple and staying positive.  It really is PR, you make Mr. Trump look good and you look good.  It’s that simple.

Jonah:  Well there’s been a lot of turnover in the position of press secretary.  Would you consider taking the position if it opens up again in the future?

Miller: I would think about it, but to be honest I’m more comfortable behind the scenes.  I do public relations, I help promote other people, but being in front of the press every day isn’t my idea of fun.  I’d rather see my name mentioned briefly in an article about someone else, then be the focus of the story.

Jonah: It seems like Trump could use some of your PR right now, his approval rating keeps falling lower and lower.

Miller: He definitely could use my talents right now, there are a lot of scandals that won’t go away and if I was running his PR people wouldn’t be getting distracted by his random outbursts, they’d be getting distracted by good news.

Jonah: On those scandals, the one that keeps hanging around are his ties to Russia.  Are you aware of any business dealings he had there?

Miller: I’d rather not answer that question.

Jonah: We’ve had a very open and seemingly honest interview up until now, but this question you don’t want to answer?

Miller: That is correct.

Jonah: You’re smart enough to see how that looks to the average person, we’ve been having a nice conversation then suddenly you don’t want to answer a question.  You know how that looks right?

Miller: I have no comment on that issue.  In fact, we’ve spoken for quite some time and I have other work to do.  I’d like to wrap this up if we can.

Jonah: Well, OK then.  I want to thank you for your time Mr. Miller, I really do appreciate you taking the time to speak with me today.

Miller: No problem, you have a good day. 

Thursday, December 7, 2017

The 45 Most Important Players to the Chicago Bulls Dynasty - #40 Ricky Blanton

Ricky Blanton
Ricky Blanton was a throwback, spending five years in college at LSU. He even averaged over 20 points and eight rebounds per game during his senior season. He impressed enough that he was drafted in the second round by the Phoenix Suns in 1989. Fun fact, that draft pick originally belonged to the Chicago Bulls but was traded along with Ed Nealy for Craig Hodges. He didn't make the Suns, but he kept on grinding.

He was brought on during the 1992 preseason by the Chicago Bulls, but he failed to make the team. Still, he kept sharp with the Wichita Falls Texans. I checked, and yes, Wichita Falls is in Texas. It paid off for him in February of 1993 when the Chicago Bulls signed him to a 10-day contract.

Blanton made those 10 days count as he got in two games, threw up seven shots, hitting three of them for a total of six points. He also managed three rebounds, an assist, and not one but two steals in his limited time. The Bulls won both games by 18 points, tying him for the greatest winning percentage of any player in NBA history.

Unfortunately, the Bulls hubris got the best of them, and they did not renew his contract. The Bulls would go on to lose games during that season, but they did still manage to win their third title in as many years.

Ricky was the ultimate victory cigar. That's why I call him Ricktory Blunton.

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Wednesday, December 6, 2017

The Post Y2J Crisis: What Happened After Chris Jericho Made His WWE Debut - Part 3

For those who missed it:
Part One
Part Two

When we last left off with Chris Jericho's WWE career, he was losing almost all of his matches, and it was to benefit the likes of Prince Albert and The Headbangers. But now, Jericho was ready for greatness, he was ready for his first memorable long-term feud in the WWE. He was ready to take on the man, the myth, the leg...wait, rewind. The woman, the myth, the legend, Chyna.

Chyna had most recently feuded with Jeff Jarrett. Jarrett had a reign of terror on women where he literally just kept beating up and demeaning women for months straight without anything bad happening to him. I thought about writing about it, but it is SUPER uncomfortable and should probably never be mentioned again. Anyway, Chyna beat Jarrett for the Intercontinental Title. In fact, she beat him so badly that he was on WCW the next night.

This led to her first title defense feud, and Jericho was the ideal foil for Chyna. He started by challenging her but getting attacked from behind when he was not paying attention. Then he challenged her to an intergender tag match where he would take a random female fan and take on her and D-Lo Brown. That random female happened to be Stevie Richards in a dress, but it still counts. Either way, Chyna stripped down Stevie and her and D-Lo got the win. Maybe things weren't quite looking up for Jericho yet.

Then, looking for an easy victory, Jericho challenged Stevie Richards to a match. Stevie came out dressed as Chyna and Jericho delivered a beating to him. But then Chyna came out and hit Jericho with the Intercontinental Title with the ref distracted, and yes, Jericho lost to Stevie Richards. While Jericho was trying with Chyna, it also turned into a Stevie Richards feud, because, you know, Jericho wasn't enough of a personality to feud with Chyna, so getting Stevie in there made sense. Stevie would lose to Chyna dressed as Jericho, and then cost Jericho a match against The Godfather by dressing as a ho and costing him the match.

But Jericho bounced back with a blistering promo on Chyna on the Raw before he would challenge her for the Intercontinental Title at Survivor Series.

He was so confident in his abilities that he promised to have a sex change if he lost to Chyna. Finally, after all the back and forth, Jericho met Chyna at Survivor Series in what was a surprisingly good match. There was back and forth, false finishes, and an entire crowd of Jerichoholics which the WWE couldn't possibly ignore. Unfortunately, your hero and mine, Y2J, was beaten by a Pedigree off the top rope for Chyna to retain her title.

The following night on Raw, Y2J was clearly distraught.

He tried to put on a brave face, but he got distracted and lost to, "The Vampire Before Vampires Were Cool," Gangrel. Jericho would get his revenge against Chyna later that night.

Because of Jericho's mighty strength, hammering a mallet near Chyna's hand caused vibrations that broke Chyna's hand. By doing this, Jericho proved that women are not as tough as men.

He used this momentum to take out the World's Strongest Man, Mark Henry in his next match. After that,he took out The Godfather, because apparently Jericho was not only portrayed as sexist but racist as well.

He decided to use this momentum to challenge Big Show for the WWE Championship in a No Disqualification Match. Things were going well for Jericho until Chyna came out and hit him with a mallet. Then things were not going as well as Big Show picked up an unconscious Y2J and chokeslammed him for the win.

A week later, Y2J had finally recovered from his concussion enough to not only interrupt Mick Foley talking about making the New York Times Bestseller List but also face him in a match.

"The only reason anybody bought your book in the first place is they were hoping that you would die at the end of it." That one made me laugh out loud. It also featured Jericho proclaiming that he would write his own book. And then, despite being hit with the Intercontinental Championship by Chyna, Jericho recovered to still beat Mike Foley.

In the week leading up to his second match against Chyna at Armageddon, he tagged with Al Snow and had a no contest against The Rock n' Sock Connection on Raw before losing to Road Dogg due to Chyna interference on Smackdown.

He had his second shot at Armageddon, the last PPV of 1999, and would get the chance to the right the wrong of losing to Chyna. Amazingly, Y2J carried Chyna through another entertaining match, which included Jericho boxing, kicking, and even dropkicking the thumb that he had injured weeks earlier. After a back and forth battle, finally, your hero and mine, Y2J, overcame the odds and made Chyna submit to become the new Intercontinental Champion, a title he would hold a record nine times.

Despite Jericho being the clear heel, the crowd exploded in cheers when Chyna finally tapped out.

Finally, after months of losing to mid-level talents, and being an afterthought in more important feuds, Y2J, Chris Jericho, had risen up to get his first WWE title run. Still wrestling at the age of 47, he will go down as one of the greatest professional wrestlers of all time. It wasn't a smooth run, but there was no man or woman that was going to stop him on his way to the top.

Tuesday, December 5, 2017

The 45 Most Important Players to the Chicago Bulls Dynasty - #41 Jo Jo English

Jo Jo English
Jo Jo English did not come along at the right time. He managed to play three years with the Chicago Bulls in the 1990s and was only a part of one championship team. Even that was only for a short period of time.

English went undrafted in 1992 but signed on with the Bulls for the preseason. Although he didn't make the team, he made a positive impression as the Bulls brought him back on December 2nd. Although his time with the Bulls didn't last long, he did manage to play in six games and accumulate 31 minutes of playing time.

In that time, he was not very good. He attempted three three-pointers but didn't make any. He attempted two free throws, but he missed them both. He did have three steals, but he also had four turnovers. Even though he was a rookie, the Bulls had seen enough after just 13 days and released him on December 15th.

Jo Jo did not do a ton to help that 1993 NBA Championship team, but he was a part of it. And he had a much larger role the following year as he not only played in 36 games during the regular season, he even played in seven playoff games. Oh, and I guess you could say he had quite the impact in the playoffs.

And that brawl with Derek Harper got him suspended for a grand total of one game. Had this happened during a championship season, Jo Jo would probably be 20 spots higher. Unfortunately, I was unable to confirm whether Jo Jo said this during the exchange:

Get out (leave) right now
It's the end of you and me
It's too late (now) and I can't wait for you to be gone
Cause I know
About her (who) and I wonder (why)
How I bought all the lies
You said that you would treat me right
But you was just a waste of time

might be thinking of the wrong Jo Jo.

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Monday, December 4, 2017

The Least Party Boy To Ever Visit Key West

Key West, Florida is a place that many consider to be the closest thing to Paradise in the United States. An island with beautiful weather where people hang loose and party hard. Over Thanksgiving, I visited Key West, and I totally get why people enjoy it so much. But at the same time, I learned that I am officially the least party boy to ever visit Key West.

And I did give it a try. When we got in town, after eight hours of driving, we went out to one of two breweries in Key West. I have to say it was a little too nice, and the beer was just fine. This was followed by a Cabaret Show. Although I wouldn't say I was excited by it, I was at least intrigued by it. Now, I didn't really get many details for the show, so I assumed it was going to be a raunchy show full of transvestites. Instead, it was just one transvestite who was paying homage to his lady heroes. I found out that I don't know jack shit about gay icons. I couldn't tell you a single thing that Liza Minnelli or Bette Midler has done, and I'm not sure if I could name three combined songs between Cher and Reba McEntire. I couldn't even spell Minnelli or McEntire without looking it up. So, yeah, it was just a transvestite doing impressions of these ladies and making crude jokes for easy laughs. It was fine, but I was hoping to have my traditional Iowa values assaulted, and this fell well short of that.

Oh, there was also a two-drink minimum, so I started off with an old fashioned, because I am a pretentious prick. Well, they showed me, because they put club soda in it, and it tasted awful. I decided to go for a water for my second drink, which they luckily did not screw up.

The next day I hung outside all day, alternating between getting sun, and hopping in the ocean and pool. We then went out to the Elks Lodge, which was probably my favorite bar of my entire time being there. They had $2 beers and $3 select mixed drinks. One of those drinks just so happened to be a White Russian, which I probably haven't had for a decade. It was more hilarious than good, but it was still enjoyable.

We went to grab dinner at Garbo's, and I would highly recommend that as I had a fish burrito that made my mouth burn with delight. It had a great kick to it. We then went to Key West's second brewery, and they had a total of three beer options; it was fine. We went to another bar where I sat there, listened to some live music, and waited for my wife to give me the go-ahead to go home. I was back by 10:30, and I would have been fine had that been two hours earlier.

It turns out that had I stayed out later, I could have watched Gravy Wrestling. Although I was slightly bummed at first, as I started to imagine the people who would willingly wrestle in gravy the night before Thanksgiving, I realized that I likely didn't miss out on anything.

On Thanksgiving, I was offered a Colorado candy bar, so that was cool. At this age, I'm too much of a square to actually partake in that, but at least I had the opportunity.

Honestly, my highlight was on Friday when I ditched everyone to go Fort Zachary Taylor State Park. Not only did I get to see a cool old fort from the 1800s, but they also had a really nice beach. It was a totally relaxing day and well worth the $2.50 admission. I also went to a free aquatic museum and watched a 3D video of fishees swimming around. It was awesome.

So, yeah, I went to the party capital of the USA, and my highlight was going to a state park and a museum. I am officially The Least Party Boy to Ever Visit Key West.

Friday, December 1, 2017

The Disaster Artist

***Guest post from Lukewarm Jonah***

Today, December 1, 2017 is a big day.  It’s my birthday, a big birthday, a monumental birthday, my 34th birthday.  This birthday is widely known as your Kirby Puckett birthday, and is considered one of the most important in your life.  With my Kirby Puckett birthday coming up, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking.  What should I do with my life?  How can I find a balance between what seem to be my two choices of jobs, either I hate my life and get paid a good amount, or enjoy work and literally live around the poverty line.  In this line of thought I picked up a book I got four years ago which addresses dream chasing, money vs. happiness and other similar themes and decided to give it another read.  It’s The Disaster Artist, the story of the making of the greatest bad movie ever “The Room” told by it’s co-star Greg Sestero.  It’s also an upcoming movie with a lot of buzz starring the Franco brothers, Alison Brie, and Seth Rogen, and it’s how I’ll be spending my Kirby Puckett Birthday.

My Kirby Puckett birthday is the day that I really have my hipster moment.  I’ve never cared when bands I liked got popular, but for some reason this feels different.  Maybe it’s because I put a lot more effort into “The Room” than I ever really did in music.  I mean I bought CDs, went to concerts, but it wasn’t the same level of fandom.  I’ve given “The Room” three trips to see a screening in which Tommy Wiseau, the enigmatic director, producer, writer and star, appeared in person.  Met him all three times and even shared the stage with him twice. Maybe it’s because this group feels even more personal than being a fan of a small band did.  I mean there’s a wide range of “The Room” fans, but I’m not sure if any of them wouldn’t describe themselves as geeks, nerds, dorks, or some variation of that.  I definitely feel like I fit in with my nerdy brothers and sisters when we’re laughing our asses off at the nonstop lunacy which is “The Room”.

When The Disaster Artist comes out it’s going to get Oscar buzz.  This is going to lead to the masses discovering that it’s a true story and some absolutely insane movie called “The Room” was made.  They’re going to watch it and try and pretend like they were in on the joke all along.  Maybe my fear is that these screenings and Tommy Wiseau meetings become packed with bros instead of dorks.  While the book revealed some of the darkness in Wiseau, it was at it’s heart a story about the ultimate underdog and his refusal to accept the fact that he was one.  Tommy was us, we were Tommy.  We were people of different ages, races, genders, who could say my dream isn’t that insane compared to Tommy’s and look at him, he made his movie and comes to screenings like this to be adored by his fans.  If Tommy Wiseau can be a movie writer, director, and star, then there’s literally nothing that we can’t do. 

So on my fateful Kirby Puckett birthday I’ll go to a screening of “The Disaster Artist” with my lovely wife.  I’ll enjoy watching this insane story play out on film with talented actors and actresses playing the parts.  I’ll enjoy watching it with the majority, if not all of the audience in on the madness of “The Room” waiting for their favorite parts of the movie to be created and acted out on screen.  It will be fun, and I’m sure it will be a great movie that tells a story that I’m fascinated by, but it’s the beginning of the end for us weirdo fans.  I’ll get to hang on to that feeling for a little while longer as the week after this screening we’re heading back to Portland for another screening of “The Room” but with never before seen special guest Greg Sestero. 

Am I really mad at the masses finding out about this fantastic movie that makes you wonder if you’ve done some sort of mixture of peyote and angel dust, gotten on a plane, and ended up in Bulgaria?  No, not really.  I can’t help but be happy for the success that this will bring to Tommy and Greg, and hopefully some of the other forgotten members of “The Room”.  I think I’m just stressed out because my Kirby Puckett birthday is coming up and I’m clearly receiving some signs from whatever heavenly beings are up there that I need to make my Kirby Puckett year count.  I need to chase my stupid dreams for at least a year.  I mean if a guy who can’t speak, write, or understand English fluently can make a movie, then why can’t I accomplish my dreams?    

Thursday, November 30, 2017

The 45 Most Important Players to the Chicago Bulls Dynasty - #42 David Vaughn

I just read "The Jordan Rules," Sam Smith's story of the 1990-1991 Chicago Bulls season that primarily focuses on Michael Jordan, but through nearly 400 pages, everybody gets a fair amount of ink. It made me long for those Chicago Bulls glory days, so I am going to go back and rank every player's contribution to the Bulls six NBA Titles during the 1990s.

David Vaughn
David Vaughn had a solid pedigree. He was drafted out of Memphis in the first round by the Orlando Magic. His biggest claim to fame is nothing he did on the court, but he was involved in some notable transactions.

Right before the 1997-98 season got started, he was traded, along with Brian Shaw from Orlando to the Golden State Warriors in order for the Magic to acquire four-time All-Star and three-time league leader in free throw percentage, Mark Price. Unfortunately, this would be Mark Price's last season as he has the lowest free throw percentage since his rookie season, shooting just 84.5% from the stripe.

Then, in February of 1998, he was traded, along with two second round picks, to the Chicago Bulls for two-time NBA Champion, Jason Caffey. To say Michael Jordan was excited would be an understatement as he told reporters, "I don't know anything about David. Every time I've seen him, he's never been in uniform. I think that says a lot."

Alas, his impact for the Chicago Bulls was fairly minimal. He played in three games for a total of six minutes but shot perfect from the field in that limited time. Still, perfection was not enough, as the Bulls released him just two weeks after acquiring him, a decision they would surely regret.

After being released, he was acquired by the New Jersey Nets. And in the first round of the playoffs, those Nets would take on the Bulls in a best-of-5 series. Vaughn was all over the court as he averaged 36 blocks per 36 minutes. Luckily for the Bulls, the Nets only played him for a single minute as they got swept 3-0.

Although this is not the block from the playoffs, there was a time when David Vaughn got a block on Michael Jordan, and it is WAY, WAY, WAY, WAY more awesome than you can possibly imagine. It might be the greatest block on Jordan in basketball history.

I am just getting started with this list, but I doubt anyone else will be able to say they were part of the Bulls Dynasty as well as coming just three games away from ending it in a single season.

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Wednesday, November 29, 2017

The Post Y2J Crisis: What Happened After Chris Jericho Made His WWE Debut - Part 2

For those who missed it, part one is here.

When we last left Chris Jericho's run in WWE, he had just ended Ken Shamrock's career on a random episode of Smackdown. That was his most notable feud as he had also injured Road Dogg earlier in his run, but he had already gone a long ways down since going toe-to-toe with The Rock. Sadly, things were about to get a whole lot worse before they were going to get better.

First off, he went to Unforgiven, and since he had ended Shamrock's career, it was time to move on, so he fought X-Pac. Jericho lost when the Road Dogg came out to help out X-Pac.

The next night he took a giant step up in competition when he faced Big Show. But he lost by disqualification when Prince Albert interfered. Yep, Jericho was a side character in a Big Show/Prince Albert feud. On top of that, Jericho did the most painful move in pro wrestling to Big Show behind the ref's back, the low blow, and Big Show shook it off three seconds later. The low blow is enough to knock out Brock Lesnar, and Jericho couldn't even take Big Show off his feet with it. That's bringing incompetence to a new level.

Later that week, Jericho and Hughes took on the New Age Outlaws, and yet again, they were just there to set up the Outlaws for their illustrious feud with The Super Heavyweights, Crash and Hardcore Holly.

But Jericho flashed again with main event talents, as he interrupted The Rock n' Sock Connection.

Outside of dropping a hard R on Mankind, this was the most entertaining thing that Jericho accomplished in his early run in the WWE. It even had The Rock dropping shade on Juventud Guerrera, which may have sparked him to turn into Juvy Juice. But it set up a match between The Rock and Y2J, which at least made Jericho seem important again. Unsurprisingly, The Rock won, and also unsurprisingly, this match was more done to further the feud between The Rock and the British Bulldog as the Bulldog immediately ran down at the conclusion of the match. Yes, yet again, Jericho was the third wheel in a feud for two.

but Jericho would not stay down for long as he tagged with his new best friend, Curtis Hughes, to take on the newly reformed Headbangers. I thought about embedding the link to this match, but it was awful. Jericho got mad at Curtis Hughes, left the match, and the Headbangers had their triumphant return.

Finally, Jericho's attitude caught up to him as he brawled with Curtis Hughes in the locker room at the next Smackdown. They then had a match where they brawled some more, but Jericho got the upper hand when Howard Finkel distracted the ref so Y2J could hit him with a chair. Since Jericho is such a gracious winner, he gave Curtis Hughes a consolation gift after their match, the services of Harold (Jericho could never remember his name) Finkel. And most importantly, Jericho was back in the win column and would surely use this for unstoppable momentum.

At the No Mercy pay per view that week, Jericho stole the show by...not appearing or even being mentioned. He was instead downgraded to a Sunday Night Heat match against D-Lo Brown. Y2J did not win.

Somehow, someway, Jericho made it through all of this and would begin his first run to a title, but we'll get to that next time. 

Tuesday, November 28, 2017

The 45 Most Important Players to the Chicago Bulls Dynasty - #43 Chuck Nevitt

I just read "The Jordan Rules," Sam Smith's story of the 1990-1991 Chicago Bulls season that primarily focuses on Michael Jordan, but through nearly 400 pages, everybody gets a fair amount of ink. It made me long for those Chicago Bulls glory days, so I am going to go back and rank every player's contribution to the Bulls six NBA Titles during the 1990s.

Chuck Nevitt
Chuck Nevitt is a man who maximized his time in the NBA. He never played in more than 43 games in a single season, his career high in points was just 3.8, and that was in only six games, but this man managed to play from 1982-1994. There were three years in there where he didn't play in the NBA spread out throughout that career, but a twelve year stretch of playing in the highest organization is pretty impressive.

How did he manage this? Um, long story short (no pun intended), he was tall as shit. Seven feet, five inches, but weighing just 217 pounds. Nevitt managed to make Shawn Bradley look like Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Also, the 1991-92 Chicago Bulls were not the first championship squad that he played on, as he also won a title with the 1985 Los Angeles Lakers, making him the tallest player to ever be on a NBA Championship roster.

He played the preseason in 1991 with the Bulls but was released before the season started. Then, a few weeks later, he was signed again and would last a month with the team. In four games with the Bulls, his greatest contribution may have been the nine minutes he provided. Yes, he did have an assist, a rebound, and two points, but even that was on three field goal attempts. But in those nine minutes, he also managed two fouls and three turnovers. I can't imagine he shared the court with Michael Jordan at all, as I think Jordan notoriously hated big men and may have murdered him on the court for his performance.

Chuck Nevitt may have not been the best player in Bulls history. Actually, I think we can definitively say he wasn't. But he was the tallest, and that counts for something.

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Friday, November 24, 2017

How To Make Money Online: TaskRabbit Is a Total Scam

I heard about TaskRabbit the same way that everyone heard about TaskRabbit: On an episode of The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. Since I'm looking for odd ways to make money, I decided to look into doing tasks for people, since some of it, you don't even need to leave your own home. Well, this review is going to be a short one, because TaskRabbit is some bullshit.

I didn't last long TaskRabbit, because they are charging way too much to verify people aren't murderers on Craigslist. It was like $20 or $25 to sign up to be a tasker. Then, TaskRabbit takes 30% of all of the earnings. This is an incredible scam.

Do not sing up for TaskRabbit. Just use Craigslist. Most of the time you won't be murdered, and with TaskRabbit, your bank account will be murdered every time by hidden fees.

Tuesday, November 21, 2017

The 45 Most Important Players to the Chicago Bulls Dynasty - #44 Rory Sparrow

I just read "The Jordan Rules," Sam Smith's story of the 1990-1991 Chicago Bulls season that primarily focuses on Michael Jordan, but through nearly 400 pages, everybody gets a fair amount of ink. It made me long for those Chicago Bulls glory days, so I am going to go back and rank every player's contribution to the Bulls six NBA Titles during the 1990s.

Rory Sparrow
Rory Sparrow is way too good of a basketball player to be this low on the list. He played 12 years in the NBA, and he was good. Oh, but there is a slight addendum to that, as he was good for every team except for the Chicago Bulls.

Excluding his first and last seasons, Sparrow averaged double digit points per game for every team he played with for at least one season except for the Chicago Bulls. Probably his best season was his 1984-85 season with the Knicks where he averaged ten points, seven assists, two rebounds, and a steal, all while shooting over 50% from the field and 86% from the free throw line.

But let's get to how Sparrow did for the Bulls. Looking for help early in the 1987-88 season, the Bulls traded the Knicks a second round pick for his services. He received a good amount of playing time, averaging 18 minutes per game, but he made little impact in games. This was probably only partially due to deteriorating skills as this was in the prime of Michael Jordan hogging the ball and verbally abusing anyone else who dared to take a bad shot.

He was released before the 1988-89 season and provided solid play for the Miami Heat and Sacramento Kings. In 1991, the Los Angeles Clippers signed him for the preseason but released him before the season began. The Bulls swooped in to sign him to strengthen their bench as the season began.

Unfortunately, the second stint was shorter and less productive than the first. He played in four games, and his most impressive stat was getting four assists during his 18 minutes of play. He was 1/8 from the field and really didn't offer much beyond that. He lasted just 19 days with the team before being waived.

Out of everyone on this list, he probably belongs in the top-15 for overall career, but we're judging how much he helped the Bulls Dynasty, and he had very little positive impact on that 1991-92 season.

I think he's okay with that. He won Sports Illustrated Sportsman of the Year in 1987 for his charitable endeavors, and he currently works for the NBA league office. On top of that, he's the greatest Rory in NBA history. Not too shabby for a fourth round pick out of Villanova.

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Friday, November 17, 2017

I Like To Show Ass When I Pee

We live in a fairly soft and stuck up society these days. People like it when you follow "social norms" and when you don't "act like a weirdo." Well, I'm here to tell you that sometimes the weird feels better. That's why I like to show ass when I pee.

If you're a fella, we all know the kid who used to pull his pants down to his ankles to take a whiz at the urinal. Well, guess what? I was that kid. I was shamed into conformity, but I'm thinking that maybe 6-year-old me had the right idea, maybe showing ass while peeing is the proper way to do it. As an adult, I have learned that I like to show ass when I pee.

Now, since I do follow societal norms, I have not brought this to the public sphere. I am discreet at a urinal, but if I'm at home? All bets are off. The waist of my pants (almost always gym shorts) is thigh high at best, and it is simply a much better experience. You're not bunching everything up in an area, and you just get to stand there with nothing but freedom in front of you.

So, yes, in a public restroom, you should probably not act like a weirdo, but when you are in the comfort of your own home? Let your ass hang out and grab life by the balls...uh, scratch that (literally), and let the feeling set you free.

Thursday, November 16, 2017

The 45 Most Important Players to the Chicago Bulls Dynasty - #45 Jack Haley

I just read "The Jordan Rules," Sam Smith's story of the 1990-1991 Chicago Bulls season that primarily focuses on Michael Jordan, but through nearly 400 pages, everybody gets a fair amount of ink. It made me long for those Chicago Bulls glory days, so I am going to go back and rank every player's contribution to the Bulls six NBA Titles during the 1990s.

Jack Haley
Somebody had to come in at 45, and just like many other roles that most would not have wanted to take, I feel like Jack would embrace his role in kicking off this series. Jack Haley spent ten years in the NBA. Well, okay, not really. He started in 1989 and ended in 1998, but he had some stops at other leagues in between there. His best work was during his first stint with the New Jersey Nets. In the 89-90 season, he started 26 games for the Nets and averaged six points and five rebounds per game. He also had less illustrious stints with the Spurs and Lakers.

Although it may not be greatly remembered, Haley also had two stints with the Bulls as he got there before they started winning championships as he was drafted in 1987 and played for the Bulls in 1988-89. He was claimed on waivers by the Nets in 1989 but came back to the Bulls for the 95-96 season.

His impact on the court was about as small as it could get. He played in a grand total of one game. He played seven minutes but did manage to put up six shots and two free throws. I have not been able to confirm that Jordan made him sit on the bench for the rest of the year because he was jealous of anybody getting up that many shots in that little of time.

But Haley made the most of his experience on the bench as he was an enthusiastic cheerleader for the team and provided a friend to Dennis Rodman which is not an easy job to do.

Unfortunately, Jack Haley passed away in 2015 due to heart disease. He was only 51 years old. He's one of those guys that seemed like a great guy and you never really heard anything bad about him.

I don't want to end on a sad note, so just in case you forgot how awesome Jack Haley was, here's some photos to help jog your memory.
I know what you're thinking. There is no way there is a better picture than that. Oh, but there is.

I know that now you are thinking, that this is the photo that cannot be topped, but it was.

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Wednesday, November 15, 2017

The Post Y2J Crisis: What Happened After Chris Jericho Made His WWE Debut - Part 1

For the WWE, the Countdown to the Millennium came a few months early (and technically, a year and a few months early) as it arrived on August 9th, 1999 with the debut of Y2J, Chris Jericho. Everybody remembers the debut of Y2J as it is one of those transcendent moments that is still talked about nearly 20 years later. It helped that there was a countdown for weeks in advance; it helped that it came during the middle of a promo from The Rock, and it helped that Jericho is one of those wrestlers who doesn't just have fans, he has fanatics. If you need a refresher on the moment, take a gander below.

Even though The Rock shut up Jericho, Y2J got his revenge later in the night when he interfered in The Rock's match with The Big Show and helped Mr. Ass beat up The Rock. Maybe the most important takeaway from all of this is that yes, the WWE had a lot of stupid names during the attitude era.

The debut was obviously great, but today, I want to focus on what happened after the debut. There was a ton of momentum with Jericho coming in, but it's not like he immediately took the belt off Stone Cold Steve Austin and become the top guy in the company, so where did Jericho go from here?

Well, the next week he kept the momentum going as he interrupted The Undertaker and The Big Show which was a true "Save Us Jericho" moment as Undertaker should never speak for more than 30 seconds. He rightfully called The Undertaker "the personification of boredom." Still, it ended much like Jericho's first segment where Jericho went on his rant about saving WWE, but the WWE stalwart got the last word.

He then went on to SummerSlam to talk trash to Road Dogg, and it goes exactly like all of Jericho's previous interactions where he lambastes the stalwart WWE Superstar, and the WWE Superstar gets the last word in. Maybe the best part is when Road Dogg gets on commentary right after and admits to not owning a computer. Back then, computers were for nerds. But in a matter of a couple weeks, Jericho has gone from feuding with The Rock to The Undertaker to The Road Dogg.

Well, at least there is nowhere to go from there but up. Haha, nope, the next night he interfered in a hardcore match with Road Dogg and Al Snow. After that, Y2J needed to use Howard Finkel, who was basically being cast as a poor man's Ralphus, as bait so he could get one up on Road Dogg. And he did this all in Ames, Iowa.

Jericho finally had his first WWE match on the very first episode of Smackdown. Jericho lost the match by disqualification after putting Road Dogg through a table. After the match, he put the Walls of Jericho on Road Dogg while he was passed out on the broken table, and the entire crowd cheered the nefarious heel. Since submissions hurt far more if they are done on a table, this injured the Road Dogg, leaving Jericho to move onto his next feud.

Later in the show, Jericho saved Howard Finkel from a Ken Shamrock beatdown by hitting Shamrock with a chair before sprinting away. This led to Jericho tricking Shamrock into fighting him in a parking lot where Jericho beat him down with a shovel. Then, in a very underrated moment that I wish would have become a thing, he made Howard Finkel take polaroids of him while he had Shamrock locked in the Walls of Jericho. Finally, Jericho agreed to meet Ken Shamrock face-to-face at the following week's Smackdown.

The biggest thing that came from this was the firing of Howard Finkel as Jericho could not depend on The Fink and needed to find better help.

And so Jericho brought in Mr. Hughes. That gave him protection against Ken Shamrock without any worries of personality, so he got dressed up like this.
Before Jericho could get his hands on Shamrock, he had a match with Mr. Ass, another heel, for some reason which just showed how little WWE actually cared about Jericho's impact.

Instead of waiting until a PPV for Shamrock's first match with Jericho, they instead had Jericho take him on in a first blood match on the Smackdown immediately before INSERT PPV. Jericho wore full hockey gear to protect himself, and thanks to help from Curtis Hughes, was able to win the match by causing Ken Shamrock internal bleeding. Ken Shamrock LOVED to internally bleed. And this, yes, a comedy match, on a random Smackdown, with Jericho making him bleed with a splash while wearing hockey gear, would be Ken Shamrock's last match in the WWE.

Chris Jericho's first real feud ended with no hoopla and limited buildup, but he did technically retire Ken Shamrock. Would Jericho use this momentum to take him to new heights? LOL, it gets WAY worse from here, but I'll tackle that next time.

Tuesday, November 14, 2017

How To Make Money Online: Become a Paid Juror

In my pursuit of finding weird ways to make money, I found out about a site called Sign Up Direct where you can volunteer to be a mock juror. This is a bit of a stretch to call it making money online as you do have to do this one in person, but they do find opportunities in your area. Instead of the normal $15 for an entire day's work that jury duty gives you, this gets you $120 for a little over five hours of your time. Now you're not going to set the world on fire with the payday, but it's super easy money.

I signed up and was actually scheduled to be a mock juror within a week. I went to the office on a weekday night and at registration, I quickly realized that I was by far the sexiest juror out of the 21 selected people. Before we got started, we had to answer survey questions for an hour which was super boring as you had to wait for them to record the entire group's answer before moving on to the next question. It was definitely the most tedious part of the evening.

This brought us to our first of two breaks during the evening. The most disappointing part of the night were that the snacks were terrible. A tray of small store-bought cookies. They had sodas but no bottled water, what a joke. Since I'm a meathead, I brought a protein bar, and people were hella jealous of me.

After that, it was basically just a speedy trial. The reason they do this is to try to come to a settlement without actually going to court. If one side hears that a jury is not as favorable to their side as they expected, they may be willing to alter their negotiation in order to get a deal done to either save money or ensure they get something, rather than nothing. They have the lawyers on each side there but instead of using witnesses, they just use video clips of depositions to try to prove their points.

The plaintiff's side starts, and although I am not allowed to talk about the specifics, I can tell you what I thought of the people presenting. Unimpressed is the best word to describe it. As someone who has seen nearly every episode of Suits, I know good lawyering when I see it, and this, my friends, were two lawyers that would have been absolutely shredded by Harvey Specter. Hell, they may have had trouble with Harold. On the plaintiff's side, they had an older gentleman who had the charisma of a mosquito. He presented some facts, presented some testimony and told us that we should do what's right. Although he wasn't entertaining with it, he had enough information that I was definitely on his side when he had finished, and the defendant was going to have a lot of work to do for me to change that opinion.

The defendant did not deliver. He brought the charisma, but unfortunately, the words that came out of his mouth showed no compassion, and it made him unlikable. He didn't talk for as long as the plaintiff's side, and that was good, because he really didn't do himself any favors when he opened his mouth. It was disappointing, as I was hoping to be wowed by some good lawyering, but these two were total amateurs.

We wrapped up with a quick rebuttal from the plaintiff's side, but even he knew he didn't have much work to do at that point. After that, we split into three groups and came up with our own individual decisions. Finally, after we have filled out that form and given our justification, we talk about it as a group to come together as a group decision. luckily, we all agreed that the plaintiff should win, so then I took charge and just had us average what we thought the settlement should be to come up with our final number, because it was past 11:00 PM, and I just wanted to get out of there at that point.

The highlight of the night was the end where they give you an envelope with your pay - straight cash, homey. Overall, it's easy, boring work, but I have $120 and compared to some of the previous installments of making money online, this one has definitely been the most lucrative. The only issue is that outside of signing up, it's not done online, which does definitely give it an advantage.

Long story short: I'm rich, bitch.