Shinesty Has The Pajamas of Your Dreams

Shinesty is at it again. Known for some sweet NFL Suit Jackets, they are expanding their repertoire just in time for the holiday season. They have an abundance of holiday sweaters and pajamas that can keep you both stylish and comfortable during these cool winter months. I would say cold, but living in Florida, cool is about as extreme as it gets down south.

I decided to go the pajamas route, and Shinesty graciously sent me the 8-bit Christmas onesie. There is so much going on with these that I feel like I need to rank my five favorite characters. 

5. Fire Breathing Dragon

Usually fire breathing dragons are pretty scary, but this guy seems like he’s up for a good time. He would definitely help you get your fireplace going if you needed it. Also, he’s even wearing a Christmas hat. Tis the season.

4. Abominable Snowman Celebrating With Christmas Tree

Let’s face it, the Abominable Snowman is definitely somebody who gets way too excited for presents and refuses to let anyone sleep in on Christmas morning. Some would say that he doesn’t understand that it is better to give than receive, but he’s just so happy when he gets to receive that I’m going to give him a pass.

3. Reindeer With Snow Diarrhea

Reindeer with Snow Diarrhea is definitely hoping that you’re not seeing that he has snow coming from his butt. If he asks, say you didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary.

2. Gorilla Humping Presents

Abominable Snowman may love presents, but this Gorilla LOVES presents.

1. Hulk Hogan

I know, he’s wearing red trunks instead of the yellow that we grew accustomed to, but the big muscles, the handlebar mustache, the thinning blonde hair, that is definitely the holiday version of Hulk Ho-Ho-Hogan, and since Hulkamania was running wild through my childhood, I have to give him the top spot. 

So I have talked about the style, but I need to talk about the comfort. I’m not a big pajamas guy, but I am definitely going to be utilizing these bad boys. Down in Florida, my window is probably only a couple months, but I’m originally a Midwestern Boy, and considering how awful the weather is up there, you could use these things for six months at least to stay cozy and content during hibernation season. I also really like how there’s no footies on the end of these things. I don’t care how cold it is, I need my feet to breathe, and these jammies allow me to do that.

I also love that they have pockets built in so you can use them on the go as opposed to only being able to use them for sleep. I could go to the store in these if I needed to. If you're single, it might help you pick up chicks since they would make the subliminal connection of sleep, and then want to sleep with you. That's psychology 101.

But my favorite part of these is that they don’t just zip up, they zip all the way up.

For some reason, it took me zipping the hood all the way up before my wife noted how good the pajamas look, but a compliment is a compliment, so I'll take it. Trust me, it's much easier to seduce a lady when they don't realize how ugly you are.