Thursday, August 13, 2015

Ranking Al Snow's Worst Gimmicks

Al Snow is known for being a jobber. That sounds bad, but he is probably the most successful jobber in history. Barry Horowitz rode being a jobber to a little success, but Al Snow rode being a jobber to a full career, one in which he won far more than his jobber status would have you believe. Although he is most remembered as the guy who brought a mannequin head out with him, that was sadly the highlight of his gimmicks, as things were far, far worse before that. It's time to take a look back at the gimmicks that Al Snow rode to legendary jabroni status.

5. Al Snow
Yes, sadly, this was Al Snow's best gimmick. He is most famously known for his work in the JOB Squad. I looked up on YouTube to try to find a relevant video, and this is what I found:

This video contains:
Al Snow losing in strip poker to a deer head.
Nicole Bass giving mouth to mouth to Val Venis.
Hardcore Holly.
Al Snow wrestling a mannequin head.
Al Snow missing a moonsault onto said mannequin head.
Al Snow winning the Hardcore Championship from the mannequin head.

And this was Al Snow's BEST gimmick. Ladies and gentleman, The Attitude Era.

4. Steve Moore
Have you ever heard of Steve Moore? Yeah, you probably shouldn't, as he was just used to get squashed in 90s WWE matches. That still makes it his second best gimmick. Yeah, things are about to get real ugly from here on.

3. Shinobi
A year later, he wrestled as Shinobi, a guy who wore a ton of different masks. He was supposed to be the answer to beating Shawn Michaels, but shockingly, he did not win that epic match on Superstars. Shinobi's most amazing moment was when he lost a match on Raw, and then they started advertising a match for The New Rockers. Speaking of The New Rockers...

2. Leif Cassidy
Remember The New Rockers? The New anything is just a really awful idea in wrestling. LOD 2000 is probably the best example of this, but The New Rockers aren't far behind. The Rockers were a tag team carried by Shawn Michaels until Shawn became too big of a star and turned on Marty Jannetty. A few years later, Jannetty brought in Leif Cassidy, which was basically just another Marty Jannetty. They never won a tag title despite the following teams becoming tag team champions during this period.

The Quebecers - A couple Canadians.
Men on a Mission - Just had a really fat guy, which made them unstoppable in this era of the tag team division.
The Bodydonnas - They did have Sunny; they did not have talent.
1-2-3 Kid and Bob Holly - they weren't even together long enough to get a tag team name, and it involved two guys who weren't even to their most memorable gimmicks at this point.
1-2-3 Kid and Marty Jannetty - This is basically The New Rockers, but they decided 1-2-3 Kid was good enough to put the strap on, for the SECOND time, where Leif Cassidy was never that important.

How does it get worse from here?

1. Avatar
Avatar is not only the worst Al Snow gimmick ever. It may be the worst gimmick ever. I remember having Raw playing in the background while aggressively blogging to my heart's content. I fully admit that when I heard Vince McMahon say the words, "And coming up next, we have a new superstar making his debut, Avatar," my ears perked like they had never perked before. I have never heard the name Avatar before, so I was pumped. He looked kind of karate like, and I immediately knew he was somebody, but it took me about 1.5 seconds before I realized that it was Al Snow.
Yes, Al Snow was Avatar. But it gets better. He came down as a dude, and then got in the ring and put on a stupid mask. It would be like if Finn Balor came to the ring as Finn, and then laid in the ring for two hours while he was "transformed" into The Demon. It kind of kills the effect of the mystery behind the mask. As I sat there with my mouth agape, I realized that no matter how bad things would get for Al Snow, it could never be as bad as Avatar.


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