Tuesday, November 17, 2015

I Can't Eat Fast Food

I am a cheap person. There are very few areas where I do not go for the cheapest option possible. The only areas that I don't are because of lessons I learned by being too cheap. This is a huge reason why I cook almost all of my meals. Normal adults go out for lunch during their work week. I have not bought lunch on a normal workday (travel sometimes requires it) in years. Now, these are not always gourmet homemade meals, as I have had to stoop to peanut butter sandwiches just to avoid purchasing a lunch. Typing this out does help me realize what a loser I am. But there is another reason that I make all of my own food.

Everything else fucks my stomach up.

I will occasionally fall into the fast food trap over the weekend, and it is always a bad idea. Chipotle, Papa John's, insert burger joint here; they all sound like good ideas at the time, but they mess my world up. It's stomach aches and farts for the next 24 hours. And yet I continue to make these same mistakes.

You know what sounds great every time I pass one or see an ad? Checkers. Checkers is garbage food, but I could easily go for some sort of burger with their delicious ass fries. God, my mouth is watering just thinking about it. But the gut bomb that eating that meal will cost me makes it totally not worth it...and yet I may still do it.

And even though I know fast food will wreck me, I will still purchase and consume it, because marketing works, and I believe that convenience now is a good trade-off for pain and misery later on in my day. I am a dumb human being and need to stick to my own meals. They're healthier and tastier, and yes, there is more work involved, but if you smelled my farts, you'd agree it's best for everyone.


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    1. I promise to keep you updated on all of the restaurants that give me the shits.