4 Takeaways from the Iowa / Illinois Game

63-0 is a nice score. Yes, six more points would have been nicer, but let's just take this totally stress free and awesome win and enjoy the moment. 

In Your Face, Hawkeye Fans

Clearly, the Iowa coaching staff heard the complaints about a lack of usage for Noah Fant and Toren Young, so in the third drive, they decided to shove those two down our throat, and it proved the fans are all stupid idiots when Iowa easily scored a touchdown. Take that, Hawkeye fans. I think the latter is overblown as even though Young has the best yards per carry, I still think Mekhi Sargent is the best back. But not having Fant on the field in that loss to Northwestern was a crime. Not throwing to Fant is one thing, but just him being on the field will make it easier for other guys to get open. It appears the coaching staff has come to their senses, and it sets them up to smash Nebraska to end the season next week.

OMG, AJ Epenesa

OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD (deep breath) OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD. AJ Epenesa is pretty good, right? He ended with eight tackles, 3.5 for loss, and 1.5 counting as sacks. He also had a pass defensed, a fumble recovery, and a touchdown. I've gotta say, it's pretty cool having a five-star recruit on the team. Physically, he is absolutely incredible, and he's starting to get more refined in his technique. He has the ability to take over a game, and he does it as a part-time player. For funsies, I decided to see what people thought of him for the 2020 NFL Draft, and it turns out he is not flying under the radar since he is already projected as the seventh overall pick, but at least we still have a year plus with him on our side. I plan on enjoying every snap of this experience.

Amani Hooker Is a Football Player

Amani Hooker had three tackles, one was for a loss, and one pass defensed. And even with that stat line, it jumped out that there is nobody that is more of a football player than Amani Hooker on this Iowa team. Epenesa and Fant are the most talented on their respective sides of the ball, but when it comes to instincts and always making the right decision and being in the right spot, there is nobody that touches Amani Hooker on this team. He is the guy that most reminds me of Desmond King in his incredible instincts out there. His stats don't jump off the page, and it appears he isn't considered much of a prospect as the only real projection I saw for him was the 13th best strong safety for the 2020 NFL Draft. Thank God people don't realize how good he is, because Hooker is what makes this defense so potent. It's easier to enjoy Epenesa, but watching Hooker is just as satisfying.

New Kirk Is The Hot Chick

New Kirk is great. He goes for it on fourth down, he doesn't punt when he is on his opponent's side of the field, and he even embraces trick plays. But New Kirk doesn't totally understand this new change. Basically, he's the teenage girl that switches bodies with an adult in a movie. Old Kirk is like, oh neato, not punting can be pretty exciting. Going for it on fourth and short is neato. But the child always runs into adult body problems that they did not expect. I mean, we all remember the cinematic classic, The Hot Chick. It was very jarring for Rachel McAdams to have Rob Schneider's body. This is New Kirk. He will often call timeouts at the end of the first half, even though he still won't have enough time to get the ball back. And then, when he was about to enter halftime up 35-0, he called a fake victory formation fumblerooski play just because he could. It was totally pointless, absolutely hilarious, and it's just New Kirk's version of how weird it is to have body hair. 

Come back next week to learn how Dalton Ferguson is actually a lot like Deuce Bigalow, European Gigolo (obviously Parker Hesse would be the original Deuce Bigalow). 

4 Takeaways From The Iowa / Northern Iowa Game

Another week, another win for the Hawkeyes. Although Northern Iowa scored some touchdowns during garbage time, Iowa throttled the Panthers from the very start and finally had a dominating game where you can exhale and just enjoy the beatdown. Iowa should always beat a team like Northern Iowa in that manner, but as we know, it doesn't always work that way. Here are five big takeaways from Saturday night's game.

1. Nate Stanley Is the Best QB of the Kirk Ferentz Era...and the Worst Fit
Nate Stanley has the most talent of any quarterback Iowa has had on its roster during the Ferentz era. I would be very surprised if he wasn't the highest draft pick in a couple years, but although the talent is there, it's still very raw. That leads to total inconsistency, so although the ceiling is the highest, the floor is Jake Christiansen levels. The guys that have been successful under Ferentz haven't had the biggest arms, but they were accurate and quick decision makers. During Saturday's game, Stanley showed what he could he could be as outside of the interception, he looked great all game long. This is going to sound like a massive insult, but he kind of reminds me of Josh Allen with less arm strength and mobility. He still has a really good arm, but it's not a howitzer. His mobility, uh, yeah, that's not going to win any games. It's possible that he can gain consistency and accuracy in his throws, but in the meantime, he will guarantee that Iowa fans yell at their TV, sometimes in celebration, sometimes...not so much.

2. Iowa Doesn't Need a Lead Back
Ivory Kelly-Martin was supposed to be the starter this season, but due to an injury in game one, those plans have changed. In his place, Toren Young has taken over the lead role with Mekhi Sargent right behind him. It was always supposed to be a time share, but the percentages have changed. Luckily, the production hasn't. Iowa has two, and possibly three when IKM returns, backs that can be trusted to get in the game and make plays happen on the ground. In this game, Young led in rushing yards with 84 on the ground, including a touchdown, but Sargent had the more standout day as he had 72 yards, two touchdowns, and a 48-yard reception. The Iowa offensive line appears to be a lot closer to good than great, but these backs will get yards if given some holes, so even with an injury, there is enough depth to still keep the ground game churning.

3. Good God, This Defensive Line
Is it fair to ask whether this is the best defensive line during Kirk Ferentz's tenure? I know it's a bit absurd at first glance, but even if the starters can't quite be considered the best, Iowa has never had this amount of depth at all positions of the defensive line. Right now, the starters are Matt and Anthony Nelson, Sam Brincks, and Parker Hesse. If you swapped to the reserves of AJ Epenesa, Cedric Lattimore, Brady Reiff, and Chauncey Golston, that would still be a really good defensive line. There isn't a single one of those guys that I feel bad about when they are in the game, and that ability to swap guys out and keep them fresh may make this the most effective defensive line that Ferentz has ever had. As with all things Iowa, the big test comes this week, but even with the big hogs up in Wisconsin, they can't be feeling great about their chances on neutralizing this Iowa defensive line.

4. Tyrone Tracy Had 1 Catch, and I'm All In
Tyrone Tracy Jr. caught a pass from Peyton Mansell, and the fact that he caught the ball and looks fairly fast is enough to sell me on him being Iowa's best receiver. The wide receivers did have BY FAR their best game of the season, but I still don't have overwhelming confidence in any of them. Brandon Smith seems to be the most talented, and somehow Nick Easley emerged from the darkness to get ten receptions and a touchdown, but I haven't seen any of them reliably finding ways to get open. When Iowa can stretch the field with the vertical passing game, they are legitimately dangerous on offense. It gets them away from predictability where opposing defenses actually have to line up guys more than five yards off the line of scrimmage. I have no way of knowing whether Tracy can be that guy, but Iowa still needs one, so I'm just going to keep my wishful thinking.