Thursday, March 26, 2015

The Bushwhackers Were Stupid Awesome

The Bushwhackers will be inducted to the WWE Hall of Fame this week, and that actually caused some controversy. Not that the WWE Hall of Fame makes any sense but teams like Demolition or The Hart Foundation may have deserved to be inducted first. Those people said The Bushwhackers were stupid, and they were right. The Bushwhackers were stupid...stupid awesome.

The Bushwhackers may have never won the Tag Titles, but they never needed them. They weren't there to fight and prove they were the best, they were just accidentally good at getting in fights with other wrestlers. It didn't matter if they won or lost, because you were never sure if they even knew the rules.

Their finishing move was a battering ram where they used the head of their teammate as a battering ram to the gut of their opponents. The battering ram is literally the worst finisher in the history of pro wrestling, but it's still awesome. But The Bushwhackers weren't designed to make sense, so that their heads were so hard that they could absorb any punishment and knock the wind out of their opponent makes enough sense to an 8-year-old to be cool.

And that is why we are here. I loved The Bushwhackers. I would be disgusted by them as an adult, but as a kid, there was no tag team I loved more. Butch once licked my head. Is it the greatest moment of my life? I mean, yeah, getting married was cool, but any asshole can get married. Very few can get licked by a Bushwhacker.

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