Monday, May 9, 2016

Ahmed Johnson: What Is There To Say?

Ahmed Johnson was my jam as a child. I was a big fan of muscular dudes, and especially liked guys with face paint or minorities. Had Great Muta been more muscular, he probably would have been my favorite wrestler of all time. But Ahmed Johnson still fit nicely within that niche.

Because of that, in my draft folder, I have had a post with Ahmed Johnson's name on it and not much else. I know there is something to be said about Ahmed Johnson, but I'm not exactly sure what I should be focusing on.

I could focus on his physique as he was a giant black man, and he was incredibly over during his WWE career. Every time the dude showed up, people got jacked up about his presence. He really didn't do much outside of being big and strong, but that was enough. He seemed destined for stardom based strictly on aesthetic appeal, but it never came together.

I guess I could talk about why it didn't come together. Ah yes, injuries. This is a guy who was always pushed pretty hard; he never seemed to take clean losses, but it only got him as far as the Intercontinental Title, which he had to relinquish immediately because he got injured. Ahmed Johnson had an athletic build, but he never really looked athletic. Everything seemed strained, and despite the million dollar exterior, the interior never held up to get him that World Title push.

I could talk about his time in the Nation of Domination, but it is literally the most forgettable thing out there. It could have been a really important thing of African American performers banding together as they felt the establishment was holding them down, but they didn't push Farooq into the title and things kind of had to go in a different direction. They turned on Ahmed Johnson, and Ahmed went right back to fighting against the Nation of Domination like he didn't just say they made some good points a few weeks earlier. But don't worry about the Nation; they ended up finding a rather charismatic superstar to replace Ahmed Johnson (Hint: he has the same last name).

I could talk about his run in WCW as Big T, but I think we should forget everything that led Booker T to become Booker to become GI Bro. 

I could talk about his promos, but what can you really say about this?

See, there's nothing to really say about that. And, here's another promo:

Okay, you got me. I have some thoughts on this. There is simply no way to listen to this promo and not think that Stone Cold Steve Austin sexually assaulted Ahmed Johnson. I mean, Ahmed gets mad at Stone Cold for entering the zone, which he later clarifies as his zone, and then he further clarifies that it is an end zone. He then FURTHER clarifies that an end zone is a place where you score and admitted that Stone Cold Steve Austin scored on him. He then warns that he is going to score on Stone Cold, and that Austin should look out, because he's coming to get him. Um, I mean, what do you say to that?

I've got nothing to say about Ahmed Johnson.

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