Because of this, I felt it was time to introduce a grading scale to differentiate between the weak wannabes and the true innovators of WCD. All dancers will be judged on the following criteria:
West Coastness - This is the toughest to define, as it is based a lot on intangibles that only the trained eye can really see. Normal people won't be able to tell the difference between the West Coast of one dance as compared to another, but that's why I'm here to guide you along.
Comedy - If you're trying to get serious acclaim for your dancing, then it ain't West Coast Dance.
Dance - Sure, anybody can be goofy on the dance floor, but you still need to have legit moves to rank highly among the best West Coast Dancers.
In the end, I will be giving a final grade of 1-10 penguins, as The Penguin was one of the earliest dance moves to help shape the future of West Coast Dance.
Today, we have a surprising battle of East Coasters, as both are proud to make their living in Washington DC. It will be Ryan Zimmerman of the Washington Nationals vs. the Russian-born Alex Ovechkin of the Washington Capitals. First, let's check out what Zimmerman brings to the table (and feel free to stop the video when Zimmerman is done, because I don't care about those other assclowns).
West Coastness - I have to give a lot of credit to Zimmerman as he does an excellent job of showing what West Coast is all about with his moves. Obviously, everyone is going to love when he breaks it down, but the key to the West Coastness is the beginning. He starts off with some proper ballroom dancing, and just when you think that he's going to zig and stick with that, he zags and busts a move. The element of surprise is an excellent way to show the West Coastness of his dance.
Comedy - Facial expressions are the key to his comedy, as when he hears the bumping beats, you can see the change from proper gentleman to Dirty Dancer. Although the lady is usually the one shaking her butt on the gentleman, Zimmerman uses gender reversal to create a good chuckle for the entire crowd.
Dance - The moves were solid, but not fantastic. He had a critical error when he was doing the ballroom dancing before the dip. Still, he made up for it by really getting into his ass grind and following up with a classic West Coast Dance maneuver with the double first-pump front grind.
Now let's move onto a compilation of Alex Ovechkin's dance moves:
West Coastness - The man doesn't stop dancing; that is what you have to love. He signs autographs...and dances. He talks on his cell phone...and dances. Hell, he even DJ's at a club...and dances. A true West Coaster will not let anything stop him from getting his groove on, and Alex Ovechkin clearly realizes this as even when he's sticking with classic moves, he keeps his body moving which is essential for the West Coastness of a Dancer.
Comedy - The loose arm move is always fun, because there is a total lack of caring with it. It makes everybody around him have a great time. He also does a great job of using his profession in his moves. He pulls his own shirt over his head, blinding himself yet keeps the dance moves coming. Also, I'm pretty sure that he's at a club that had never seen dancing before, yet he has the entire club getting their groove on, because of how much fun he is having.
Dance - I really like that when he's in the DJ Booth, he starts with a classic raising of the roof, but he isn't afraid to stray away from a classic and start windmilling the arms a little bit. He's willing to take chances which will always get him respect within the WCD community. The best move in here is very early with the autograph signing. Yes, he was signing an actual autograph, but it is a money move regardless.
Ryan Zimmerman's Overall Score - Zimmeman did a great job with West Coastness, had some solid comedy, but struggled a little bit with the Dance part. Still, it was a very good performance, so his score is...
Alex Ovechkin's Overall Score - Overchkin did a very good job with West Coatness as well. His comedy was very solid, but he really brought it with the innovative dance moves. His overall score is...
This was a great first matchup, and I give respect to both men. Still, a hearty congratulations is in order for Alex Ovechkin, a man who comes from the far east, yet has adapted to our culture to become a true West Coast Dancer.
P.S. We'll make it a video heavy day at the blog, as here's a little girl trying to sing about some West Coast Dancing: