Thursday, July 28, 2016

5-Star Hotels Are Overrated

For my job, I have to travel once to twice a month, and because of that, I stay at fancy hotels that I would never consider if I were paying for it. This sounds like I'm living that baller lifestyle, but trust me, the only reason I'm there is because the fancy people I have to deal with need to be at fancy places. But after going to some of these things, I have to admit that I don't really get what makes a 5-star hotel so great.

I've stayed in a few of these places, and there really isn't many meaningful differences. They have a lot of meeting space, which doesn't really matter to me if I'm just randomly selecting a hotel. They have a relatively nice bar and restaurant, but I'd still rather go to a real restaurant or bar to get a little culture in my life. I mean, I guess their staff dresses nicer than the people at the Red Roof Inn, but I'm a big believer in comfort over style, so I side with Red Roof on this one.

As for the rooms, they're clean, but it's not like I'm staying in a Penthouse Suite. It's about the same size as other rooms. The bed is relatively comfortable, but not so comfortable that I actually get a good night's sleep, because I simply don't sleep in hotels very well. It is a flat screen TV as opposed to an old box TV, but I can't imagine that's the only thing that makes a 5-star hotel, especially since the last one I stayed in didn't even have HBO working in my room.

The one thing that did stand out is excellent water pressure. I would have said good water pressure with the shower as it had a good stream blasting me, but that was nothing compared to the toilet. That toilet had enough pressure to swallow a damn basketball. It was damn impressive.

But are hotels strictly based off of their toilet strength? Common sense would say no, but I really can't think of any other advantage that the fancy hotels have. So, I guess I'll stay in a 5-star hotel if I murder someone with my killer crossover game and need to get rid of the evidence. Otherwise, I'll probably just go with the cheap option and double flush my poops.

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