Monday, January 8, 2018

The 2018 XFL Mock Draft - Quarterbacks

Last week, Jonah shot me a text that he would like to have a Fantasy XFL Draft. I kind of hemmed and hawed at the idea, as I really didn’t want to go through that pointless of an exercise. Then I realized that I really wasn’t doing anything more important with my life, and it would be hilarious when I selected LeBron James with my first pick and OJ Simpson with my second pick. Unfortunately, Jonah clarified that they would have to realistically be able to play in the league and not currently playing another professional sport. That screwed up my entire draft plan, but I did my best to recover.

Admittedly, both Jonah and I did minimal research before the draft and did all of our analysis during the draft. This meant that there was little rhyme or reason to any picks past the first two rounds. So instead of breaking this down round by round, we are going to go by position groups. We also only did a two-team league, because I cannot imagine finding enough nerds to have a 12 or 16 team XFL mock draft. We did do a whole 53-man roster, so you could imagine these guys being spread around across the league. Today, we start with the quarterbacks.

Quarterbacks
Team Jonah: Colin Kaepernick, Zach Mettenberger, Ryan Nassib

Team Joe: Johnny Manziel, Robert Griffin III, Rex Grossman

Joe: Although the picks usually didn’t matter, we did both select quarterbacks with our first pick. Jonah went with the obvious choice of Colin Kaepernick, so then I panicked and went with Johnny Manziel as my number one quarterback. Although Manziel was a pariah in the NFL, he will most certainly be a fan favorite in the XFL, as this league is all about attitude. 

But Manziel is definitely not guaranteed the starting spot. I brought in some great competition as I have RG3 who is likely a more athletic version of Johnny Football and would likely be considered the favorite for the starting position, although he will inevitably get injured so it won’t be hard for Manziel to see playing time.

On top of that, I have Rex Grossman. The wily veteran who just loves to sling it deep. He is the veteran presence that can let them know what it takes to make it to a Super Bowl.

Maybe the greatest thing about these quarterbacks is that I might have three of the highest selling jerseys in the entire XFL. Manziel’s jersey could say “Johnny Football,” “J Football,” or just straight, “Football.” Griffin has “RG3” on the back of his, but my top selling jersey will inevitably be Rex Grossman’s “Sex Cannon” jersey. Sure to be a hit with the kiddos.

Jonah: Believe it or not, I took this draft very seriously.  My original idea was that I could build a roster of players that would win a few games in the NFL with nothing but available players.  Then I realized the XFL was coming back so I could just build an XFL roster that would be as talented as the lower half of the NFL.  With that, Kaep was the obvious first pick in terms of football skill and marketability.  The guy could start for 5-10 teams in the NFL so he’s a no brainer, and you either love him or you hate him.  Either way people want to watch him succeed or fail.

Mettenberger is a favorite of mine.  I watched him play as a rookie in Tennessee and he was pretty average, but a rookie playing average on a terrible team is pretty good.  I’m very confused why he hasn’t gotten another shot.

My original XFL lineup included another quarterback who should be starting in the NFL, Matt Barkley.  He was signed by the Cardinals so Mettenberger moved up to backup and Nassib got a spot on my squad.  Nassib is talented, strong armed but short for a quarterback.  Another guy I’m surprised doesn’t have a roster spot somewhere in the NFL because at least he has potential to be good instead of the potential to not be terrible like some of the quarterbacks who keep getting paid.

Joe: One thing I worry about with Jonah’s team is that he’s likely going to have to depend on Mettenberger and Nassib as Kaepernick will inevitably be fired in a grand public display if he chooses to kneel during the national anthem. And buddy, you’re going to have to trade a whole lot if you want to get the Sex Cannon on your squad. 

Jonah: I love Mettenberger and Nassib has potential, plus there’s plenty of quarterbacks out there like your boy Ricky Stanzi or my boy Nathan Enderle, or everyone’s boy John David Booty.  As for your quarterbacks, Manziel and Griffin should still be in the NFL, well Griffin at least and Manziel has the ability.  I really hope Rex Grossman finds his way onto an XFL roster because I will bet you that against XFL competition he throws more picks than TDs.

Joe: That wraps up the quarterback talk. We should have something on running backs later this week.

2 comments:


  1. This may not sound fair, because it’s not

    But did you know that you can be a guy’s dream girl...

    I mean, you can literally check off every box on his “perfect woman” list...

    But if you mess up this one thing, he’ll drop you the second another option comes along?

    My friend James Bauer discovered this missing “secret ingredient” all men are constantly searching for in a woman.

    And most women have no clue it exists because guys aren’t even aware of it.

    We just KNOW when it’s missing.

    ===> The “Secret Ingredient” to obsessive love <=====

    The really cool thing is, when you know how to give a man this “secret ingredient”...

    It will send a shockwave of desire for you straight to his brain and he will HAVE to have you.

    In fact, when you do this... watch his face light up, almost as if he’s just been zapped.

    It’s that moment when he says to himself “Where have you BEEN all my life?”

    Every woman should know this. Check it out here: ====> Why men leave “perfect” women... <=====

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Win Mr, it is going to take a LOT of surgery for me to become some man's dream girl, and I think I'm good with how things are right now. Thanks for the offer, though.

      Delete