Showing posts with label Bo Dallas. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Bo Dallas. Show all posts

Tuesday, August 27, 2019

2019 WWE Brawl for All: Bo Dallas vs. Mojo Rawley

The first round continues with two big boys who know how to hit hard. Today, we settle whether it is more important to stay hyped or to bolieve in one's self.

Jonah’s #4 Bo Dallas vs. Joe’s #5 Mojo Rawley
Jonah: This is a fun matchup. I would have taken Mojo in the next round, he’s a big guy who has the football background for athleticism. You have to assume this would make him able to at least throw some good punches. Bo Dallas is a lot tougher than his booking would have you bolieve. He’s a big guy who doesn’t have show muscles, but is very strong. He also was back wrestling four months after suffering a lacerated kidney, he’s tough as nails. Mojo has the size and athleticism, but I think Dallas could withstand an early flurry and let Mojo gas himself out to win.


Joe: Uh, Jonah, apparently you’ve forgotten that Mojo Rawley does not get hyped. He STAYS hyped. You’d have better luck gassing out a Tesla. But I do think this is a bad matchup for Bo and a pretty good shot at the upset for Rawley. He’s bigger and a better athlete. Bo does have an amateur wrestling background, but he only qualified for state, in Florida, which ain’t exactly a hotbed for talent. Meanwhile, Mojo was getting D-I scholarship offers and punting balls 76 yards. And with Mojo’s personality, he has definitely gotten in some wild brawls in his day. I just think Mojo brings a little too much fire and fury for Bo to handle.


Jonah: I don’t know, I think Mojo’s hype meter has gone away since he’s a heel now and he trains with football player Jay Cutler. Bo’s a tough son of a gun, and if the fight is close he can always turn off the lights using Wyatt Family powers.


Joe: Why is Bo Dallas tough? Also, as far as I can tell, Bo Dallas has no affiliation with the Wyatt Family. He didn’t even wrestle against them in NXT. Where is this strange statement coming from? If he doesn’t have that, I don’t think he’s going to overcome the significant size and athleticism advantage that Mojo has.


Jonah: Bo Dallas is tough because he pretty much no sold a lacerated kidney. He came back in John Cena time from a serious injury. Mojo might also tire himself out between rounds with his constant thrusting. I honestly think this is pretty much a coin flip that could go either way, so you can choose. Also, Dallas has Wyatt powers and IRS powers.


Joe: Well, I decided to see how impressive it was for Bo Dallas to recover from a lacerated kidney in four months, and it turns out that it’s not impressive at all. The expected recovery time is six weeks, it takes him about three times as long to recover from something as an average human being. With that argument out of the way, Mojo hypes his way to the second round of this tournament through sheer volume of punches.


Jonah: Uggghhh fine, but I want it in the rules that Mojo has to thrust between rounds.

Tuesday, May 21, 2019

The WWE Is Ruining... Bo Dallas

Bo Dallas deserves so much more. Did you know Bo Dallas has been with the WWE for almost 11 years and he's only 28 years old? Dude started at FCW when he was 18 and was winning titles after just turning 19 years old. He was making appearances in dark matches and house shows in his early 20s. He was a wrestling phenom.

Still, he paid his dues in developmental and was integral in NXT becoming a major brand. Although he was the third person to win the NXT Championship, he was the first champion that really belonged to NXT. Seth Rollins won the title as a babyface and immediately became a heel in The Shield. Big E did the exact same thing when he joined up with Dolph Ziggler on the main roster. They never had a chance to feel like they belonged to NXT. But Bo Dallas belonged to NXT. He was a champion that the crowd absolutely despised, and that may make him the only true heel to win the World Title in NXT history.

That's wild, but Kevin Owens was a cool heel who got cheered, Samoa Joe was Samoa freakin' Joe, and I guess the closest would be Andrade Almas, but even he never came close to the heat that Bo Dallas had. He was so hated that the fans turned their back on him, meanwhile he was showing a slideshow of his trip to BOlivia. He even beat the most beloved babyface in NXT history, Sami Zayn, by nefarious means. What I'm saying is I hated him, and he was absolutely fantastic.

And then he went to the main roster and everything went to shit.

So the way to save Bo Dallas is to let this man live in the past. Let him bring up his accomplishments in the most petty ways possible. I want him feuding with Seth Rollins by pointing out how much better he was as NXT Champion. I want him to feud with Daniel Bryan, because Bryan couldn't even win a match when he was on NXT. I want him to feud with every single wrestler by just pointing out how much better he was than them in the minor league WWE system. It would be so stupid and aggravating which makes it perfect for Bo Dallas. The good news is he never has to win, and it will still work, but the great news is he will get it over, and he will at least be worthy of a short run with a secondary title.

This may not be what the WWE Universe wants, but it is what the WWE Universe needs. All we have to do is BO-LIEVE.

Other Wrestlers WWE Is Ruining
Alicia Fox
Andrade "Cien" Almas
Apollo Crews
Bayley
Big E
Big Show

Bobby Lashley
Bobby Roode
Braun Strowman
Brock Lesnar
Carmella
Chad Gable

Monday, April 29, 2019

The WWE Is Ruining... Brock Lesnar

Brock Lesnar is one of the greatest talents in WWE history. There is no era in pro wrestling history where this guy wouldn't have been a champion. He was dominant in his era, would have made an incredible foe for Hulk Hogan in the 80s and 90s, and may have been champion for 20 straight years during the era when you had to be able to legitimately fight to be considered a pro wrestling world champion. Brock Lesnar is the ideal pro wrestler.

Even with a limited schedule, he's been the most dominant force in the WWE in the last few years and one of the most dominant professional wrestlers in history. But the fans have turned against him and nobody raves about how awesome he is anymore. Although it looks like he may take time off to fight again in the UFC, there is one thing that will likely bring him back. For as much as Lesnar has accomplished, there is one title that has eluded him.

Yep, to save Brock Lesnar, the WWE must send him to NXT. I mean, sure, he's been a dominant WWE and Universal Champion, but he's never been able to win that NXT gold. Clearly, it would be the motivation Lesnar needs. I can just about guarantee that Bo Dallas constantly makes fun of him in catering as not being a real world champion like Bo was.

And the biggest issue with Lesnar is him not showing up enough. NXT tapes four episodes at a time. He could keep his same schedule and be on just as much as any other NXT star.

The issue is whether he could beat the best of the best. Sure, he can beat the likes of John Cena, Triple H, and Roman Reigns, but those guys have like two combined matches on NXT. Can he compete with the likes of Johnny Gargano, Adam Cole, and Eric Bugenhagen?

You want a fresh feeling and motivated Lesnar? Send him to NXT. And then let Matt Riddle retire him.

Other Wrestlers WWE Is Ruining
Alicia Fox
Andrade "Cien" Almas
Apollo Crews
Bayley
Big E
Big Show

Bobby Lashley
Bobby Roode

Braun Strowman
Carmella
Chad Gable

Monday, January 7, 2019

The WWE Is Ruining... Apollo Crews

As a pro wrestling fan, it is a part of our identity to always know how to utilize wrestlers better than the WWE. If WWE would just give me, random WWE fan, a job a the company, ratings would immediately rise to the levels of the Monday Night Wars, despite how television ratings have changed as a whole over the last 20 years. But until that happens, WWE will continue ruining our favorite wrestlers, and that is why it is time to point out the error in their ways. Because of WWE's incompetence, I am literally going to pick a wrestler at random and point out how they could be better utilized, because WWE is ruining everyone in one way or another.

Today, we look at a guy that I had high expectations for, and the WWE dashed those very quickly after his call-up, Apollo Crews. And of course, I wrote this a couple weeks in advance, before he got his biggest push yet, by not only winning, but dominating, a battle royal to set up an Intercontinental Title match with Dean Ambrose. He then of course promptly lost that match, but it could be a sign of things to come. If he gets a huge push immediately, great. If not, I have an alternate option below.

Before joining the WWE, Uhaa Nation had made a decent name for himself. He wasn't considered a top indy guy at the time, but he was more seen as somebody who would be a top indy guy if he continued to work that wrestling scene. He was a very important part of both Dragon Gate and Evolve, and the WWE had seen enough to sign him to a developmental deal for 2015.

He made his debut in August of 2015 and ran through Tye Dillinger, Tyler Breeze, and even Finn Balor (by disqualification) before losing for the first time to Baron Corbin. It was a weird loss for him to get, but considering that NXT often falls into new guy stays undefeated for way too long, it didn't seem to be a big issue.

Then on April 4, 2016, he beat Tyler Breeze again on NXT...wait, no, for some reason he was already called up and this happened on Monday Night Raw. Just over half a year on NXT, and he was already up on the main roster. On one hand, good for him. On the other hand, Crews could have used some more seasoning.

And that is where the problems began. WWE, if your plan to start somebody off on the right foot on the main roster is to have them feud with the Social Outcasts, maybe just hold off on bringing them up at that point. At least Crews was able to overcome that dominant stable. After that, he came close to pushes as he was in #1 contenders matches as well as actual title matches, although he never actually won those matches. The big issue, and one that anyone who watched NXT could see, was that he never developed a personality, so it was pretty hard to get invested in anything he did.

Then he joined Titus Worldwide. You may be shocked to learn that things did not get better. They avoided giving Crews a personality, but didn't really let Titus have one either as even he wasn't allowed to give many promos, just holler a lot outside the ring as Crews wrestled inside of it.

He has now ditched Titus Worldwide, which would have been my first step to making him relevant. But the issue of never guiding him along to let him work on promos will continue to haunt him in any potential rise within the company. So how can you get the most out of Apollo Crews?

I think that the best thing you can do for him is put him in a tag team. He's an ideal hot tag guy as he's strong and explosive in his moves, but he's a good enough wrestler where he could also be the scrappy side of a tag team. I will admit that I struggled to find him the right tag partner. Chad Gable was my first thought, but I would rather just put American Alpha back together. My next thought was Finn Balor, but that seems like a really poor use of Finn Balor. Ultimately, I couldn't settle, but here were my four best options.

4. Tye Dillinger
I don't know how they fit together, but I just want something for both of these guys, and although Dillinger isn't going to amaze people with moves, he's super good at what he does, so they could put on some very good matches.

3. Bo Dallas
It would be a fun pairing with Bo living in his own world away from reality while Apollo had to come in with explosive moves to save the day. There is potential there.

2. No Way Jose
I know; it seems a little too on the nose and totally like something WWE would do, but I do think it has potential. It's two guys who were brought up too early with no real plans for either one, and two guys that show tremendous potential. I think it could be a fun dynamic and two guys that could be in the tag title picture.

1. Kassius Ohno
APOLLOHNO. Kassius Ohno has been in NXT since the beginning of time. Literally, dude was there at the beginning of NXT as a developmental brand. He had some time away on the independent scene, but he's back. Still talented, still used as a guy to get other talent over, and still nowhere closer to the big shows. This team is kind of a weird combination at first, but it's a combination that I think could work. They are made to put on great matches, and Ohno can handle the bulk of the talking while letting Crews be the exclamation point in interviews. The more I think about it; the more I like it.

Apollo Crews rose up to the main roster too quickly for his own good, but it's not a dire situation as the talent is still there, and with the right setting, he can still reach his full potential. I hope 2019 provides him that opportunity.

Other Wrestlers WWE Is Ruining
Alicia Fox

Andrade "Cien" Almas

Bayley
Bobby Lashley
Bobby Roode
Charlotte Flair
Curt Hawkins

Dana Brooke
Dash Wilder
Ember Moon
Jinder Mahal
Kane
Karl Anderson
Killian Dain
Kofi Kingston
Luke Gallows
Mickie James
Mojo Rawley
Nia Jax
Peyton Royce
Randy Orton
Scott Dawson
Shinsuke Nakamura
Tyler Breeze

Monday, June 6, 2016

The Ultimate WWE Fantasy Draft - Review

Now that we have completed the ultimate WWE fantasy draft (Part one, part two, and part three), it's time to figure out the most interesting picks and hopefully get Jonah to admit my dominance in fantasy wrestling drafts. We had a long conversation, and shockingly, nothing was decided, but here are our thoughts.

Joe: Jonah, the draft is over, and I think you feel good about your roster, and I know I feel good about my roster. But the question that I'm most curious about is at the top. Did I make the right decision with Seth Rollins?

Jonah: Rollins is a good pick to have as the face of your brand.  He's got the look and the in ring skills of a star and gets a reaction from the crowd.  I feel like his heel work has been a little one dimensional but in the near future he will show whether or not he can be a little more original.  If you were in my position and rollins was off the board would you have gone with the other two shield members or gone a different way?

Joe: I did have Reigns in my top three, but I am super low on Dean Ambrose compared to most people. I understand that people really like him, but I knew there was no way I was going to end up with him in this draft. No, instead, the guy that I had at number two, and has the best argument to be number one is the doctor of Thuganomics, John Cena. I didn't take Cena with my next two picks, because right before I was about to pick him and Cesaro, I flashed back to Cesaro and Sami Zayn matches and realized that I couldn't separate those two. Why did you let Cena keep falling?

Jonah: Age and fear of injuries.  He's been banged up for a long time.  Also love for Kevin Owens.  He will be wwe champ within the year.  He does everything so well.  He's consistently the best week in and week out.  AJ Styles is fresher in terms of the wwe.  Basically anyone he faces off with is a fresh match people want to see and I think he's incapable of putting on a bad match.  Cena was next on my list I just had those few guys rated ahead of him.  We both love Brock Lesnar but are you worried you used such a high draft pick on someone that may wrestle one or two matches on your show at most?

Joe: Cena is a freak when it comes to injuries, so I'm not too worried about that. Also, he is BY FAR the biggest star in the WWE. And we really shouldn't forget that Cena had his best year as a wrestler before his injury. He often had the match of the night when defending the US Title, and the guy is a star who does a ton of charity. We hate John Cena, because we realize he is who we want to be.

I love Kevin Owens, but I think that his body does make him a tough sell to a casual wrestling fan. And AJ Styles is a great wrestler, but his potential is not leading a company.

As for Lesnar, he may only wrestle once or twice on Raw, but he's got 4-6 matches in PPVs, which will only happen with my guys. And I also get the benefit of Paul Heyman hanging around doing promos. And when Lesnar is wrestling, he is the main event (unless he's wrestling somebody shitty like Dean Ambrose, ZING). How far would you have let Lesnar fall? Also, out of your top 10 picks, who do you think was the best value?

Jonah: Hey I'm not hating on John Cena, I would have taken him if you didn't in the next round.  He does seem to be moving down the card a bit, but it was a great pick.  I do disagree on AJ, he carried TNA on his back, and I know they've become a complete joke but they were a decent company for awhile and that was the time that AJ was employed by them.  Lesnar likely wouldn't have fallen past my next two picks, I was just thinking that he doesn't wrestle on free tv, which does make it a little tougher for him since we're drafting for shows.  Paul Heyman, personal friend and follower of The Jonah Show is always entertaining.  I really like my top 10 picks, so it's tough to pick one.  Randy Orton is a veteran star who has been main eventing for a decade.  Rusev should already be in the main event, but he's working his way up due to terrible booking.  The New Day may be the best pick for me out of the top ten.  Big E will be a main eventer for at least a decade.  Kofi and Xavier are entertaining as hell, and they're both great in the ring too.  Kofi's a veteran who has been in main event feuds and shown he can hang.

So Joe, you were the first to pull the trigger on the women's division.  Why did you feel that was the right time to take the two women, and why was Charlotte your pick?  Everyone understands that Sasha is the best so I don't need any explanation on that.

Joe: On why I chose the women when I did, it was actually interesting, because you came to me with this idea, and about ten minutes later I was ready to draft as I just quickly ranked everybody. On my original list, I had New Day over Charlotte and Sasha, but when it came time to draft, I went with the ladies. Part of that is that picking Kofi and Xavier that early when I had never cared about them before had me very concerned. I felt like Big E was worthy of that pick, I mean, he is a Hawkeye, but New Day is starting to lose its luster, and even though they are still great, I don't know where things go for them in a year. I also factored in positional scarcity, and it was clear that this was the right choice. These two are a clear cut above everyone else in the division. Sasha is obviously phenomenal; I mean, I'm 31-years-old and cannot help dancing every time her music comes on. It makes me feel like a Boss. And Charlotte is so good in the ring that she has gotten two great matches out of Natalya (Takeover and Roadblock), and Natalya is only slightly more useful than a wet fart. And Charlotte is still getting better in the ring, and she's taking some baby steps on the mic. I feel like with these two picks, all I needed to add were warm bodies, and I would have the more entertaining women's division. Obviously, you're going to feel different, so what are your thoughts on your women's division?

Jonah: Well, I agree that Sasha is the absolute best, and that her music is the absolute best.  I feel she is head and shoulders above everyone on the main roster.  Charlotte is very talented in the ring, but honestly dreadful on the mic.  It's not that Charlotte is a bad pick, I just feel that she is equal to Becky Lynch.  The only difference between the two is a push.  Becky is just as talented in the ring, and she's better on the mic.  I was able to get Becky more than 10 picks later.  I was concerned about the strength of your women's division, but I feel like mine stacks up well against yours.  Becky is at worst equal to Charlotte, I later got Paige who is the true catalyst for the women's revolution.  She came in, wrestled like a champ, and demanded attention.  She's just been lost in the shuffle for some reason, that reason being the WWE writing team can't book more than two women's feuds at a time or else their heads will explode.  I'm far from a big Nattie fan, but she does put on quality matches the majority of the time so she's very useful.  Nikki Bella is underrated in the ring because she's a Bella.  She's not a horsewoman, but she puts on good matches.  Alicia Fox and Naomi are underrated and underused, but plenty talented enough.  Tamina isn't that special, but she's a good enforcer in the women's division.  My women's division is deep and talented.  I feel like Chris Jericho fell further than I would have expected.  Is there a reason you didn't want him?

Joe: First off, you owe me a new laptop, because saying that "Becky is at worst equal to Charlotte" was so laughable that I did a spit take and now my monitor is covered in smoothie. I'm hoping you don't believe that, because nobody in the world thinks Becky is equal to Charlotte. Becky is really good, but Charlotte is the Brock Lesnar of the Women's division. She's bigger, stronger, and more athletic than any woman they have. Becky Lynch is good, but she's more on the Paige/Emma level than the Sasha/Charlotte/Bayley tier.

I mean my reasoning behind not taking Jericho is that his schedule is inconsistent, and he's not around long enough to truly have a compelling feud, because you know the other guy is going over. This is the longest he's been around in what, five years? He's not a full-time wrestler, and although this iteration has been great, it started out with him calling New Day "Rooty Tooty Booty" and proceeding to spend the next month defending that as genuinely funny. Jericho has been very good, but he can also be very bad. With the limited schedule, I didn't think the risk was worth it.

Speaking of part-timers, how early did I jump the gun on The Rock? Keep in mind, there is at least a one percent chance that he gets Vin Diesel to show up with him one time.

Jonah: Well now my feeling are hurt, I do think Becky is equal to Charlotte.  Charlotte is a great wrestler, but she is awful on the mic.  Maybe Brock Lesnar is a good comparison.  He's awesome in the ring, but he's not a great promo.  Jericho seems like he's back for awhile and he's been doing great work.  His first feud with The New Day was terrible, but he's been money since.  My love for the Rock is well documented, but it was too early for him.  If you're lucky he shows up twice a year and wrestles one match, again not on free tv.  I hope he brings Vin Diesel with him, I'd buy them as tag team champs all day.  He's the most electrifying man in all of entertainment, but I'm pretty sure he's got 18 movies to film with Kevin Hart, he's going to be busy.  Speaking of part timers, how long do you figure Shane is sticking around?

Joe: I don't know how involved he will be, but I'd be pretty surprised if he wasn't back with WWE, at least on a part-time basis, and the more they talk about it, I think he's likely to be fairly involved. It was also at this point where nobody has huge potential on the wrestling side. I'm a little bummed I missed out on Tyler Breeze. Any picks that stand out for you in part two of the draft?

Jonah: I do love Tyler Breeze.  I see that I took Titus O' Neil very early, but I think he's got a ton of potential.  Do you think his recent push is because the WWE reads our columns?  I'm also very happy with my pick of Fandango.  That guy can wrestle and he's all charisma all the time.  I think he's a great value.  I like your pick of the Vaudevillians.  So who's your favorite Social Outcast?  Which on of them will you book as the breakout star of the group?

Joe: Yeah, The Vaudevillains were a team that just kept falling, but they're both fun in the ring, and Aiden English having the ability to sing is something that that could be a huge help in getting them over. As for my favorite Social Outcast, Heath Slater is great at what he does, taking beatings in an entertaining way, Curtis Axel is hilarious, even if it is sometimes unintentional, but the cream of the crop is Bo Dallas. I know it's been two years, but Bo Dallas may be the best promo in NXT history. He was the absolute best, and despite being buried since being called up, he still gets a reaction. He is a FAR BETTER promo than his brother, as Bo could actually keep things fresh, and Bray is as stale as it gets. 

Moving on, I was the guy to jump on the non-wrestlers and lock down my announce team of Mauro Ranallo and Corey Graves which could be the steals of the draft for the impact they will have on my television product. I'm interested to hear your plan as Booker T only does occasional PPVs with his schedule, and Renee is pretty rough with announcing matches. So Jonah, what the hell are you going to do with your announcers that will not make me want to change the channel?

Jonah: Renee Young might as well be El Dandy because I will never doubt her.  I think she'll be great.  Even if she's not, she's still a great interviewer.  I have Michael Cole who is the voice of the WWE, so that's a solid announcer.  Tom Phillips has been good in NXT, he plays off Graves well and his delivery helps Graves stand out.  Byron Saxton is already a RAW announcer, he's not very good, but he's good enough to talk on the flagship show every week according to the WWE.  With just those three I have plenty of announcing talent.  Don't forget I also have Funaki, the number one announcer, plus Jerry Soto on the Spanish announce team.  So your superstar women's division includes wrestling legends like Eva Marie and Rosa Mendes.  How can you make them not complete wastes of space?

Joe: Step one: Put Eva Marie and Rosa Mendes in an hour long Iron Woman Match.
Step two: Start the match and let the crowd reign down with boos.
Step three: Brock Lesnar's music.
Step four: Annihilation

Outside of that, Eva Marie has become serviceable in the ring. She's still bad, but if you told me I had to watch an hour of Eva Marie or five minutes of Natalya, I'm All Red Everything. Rosa Mendes dated Gary Barnridge a couple years ago, so I will use her to identify fantasy football sleepers.

I don't really feel like doing a deep dive into the end of this thing, so who was your favorite pick, and who were you most disappointed about a guy that you weren't able to get?

Jonah: Well I know you'll disagree with this, but Bray Wyatt at 22 is an awesome pick.  Despite terrible booking he still matters and is still over.  If they put the slightest effort into him he'll be a main eventer.  He's also very good in the ring.  I was disappointed I missed out on Neville.  That guy is awesome, hopefully when he makes his return they'll stop booking him into obscurity.  I thought he'd last longer.  What about you?  Who was your favorite pick and who are you sad you missed out on?  

Joe: I mean, the big thing for me was how things fell for me at the beginning of the draft, as I got five of my top six rated guys, only missing out on Roman Reigns. But for deeper down the list, picking Apollo Crews and Neville back-to-back was a real highlight and I was also really happy to get Emma as she has been incredible since going back to NXT. I'll be excited to see her come back from injury. 

The biggest guy that I missed out on was Rusev, as he's just so damn cool. If he didn't have a Russian accent, he'd already be in the main event scene, as he's legitimately one of the five funniest people in the WWE. Some of the later picks I would have liked to get are Tyler Breeze and Darren Young with Bob Backlund. Backlund during an election year should prove to be entertaining.

But that'll wrap up the main roster talk. Next week is NXT Week where Jonah gets that coveted first overall pick.

Monday, February 29, 2016

The 10 Best Things in the WWE: February 2016

Another month and more of the same from the WWE. I had a fascinating conversation with my brother after Fastlane. He enjoyed the PPV, where I could barely pay attention to anything outside of the main event. The reason behind this is that I watch Raw every week, and he hasn't watched Raw in months. The repetitive nature of just about every damn match on that card meant that nothing meant anything, but if it was fresh, it was probably pretty enjoyable (outside of the six-man tag, obviously). WWE has enough talent to have engaging storylines every week, but they don't give anything enough time to actually develop. They want immediate returns instead of planting the seeds for something great down the line, and that is why the product has been stale. But this is an article that celebrates what WWE does well, because it's too easy to do the opposite. Without further adieu, the 10 best things in the WWE for February 2016:

1. Brock Lesnar (Last Month: Unranked)
Anytime Brock Lesnar is on screen, I sit up and pay attention. Everything is brought to a higher level with his presence. He may not get the credit, but he might be the best professional wrestler ever. No, he's not the most technically skilled, but he could be wrestling anyone, and I would give it my full attention. I can't think of a single wrestler he wouldn't put on a great match with. Like, is anyone out there really saying they wouldn't LOVE to see him smash Hornswoggle? I'd probably get physically ill if he chose to destroy Bayley, but I'd watch, and deep down inside, a part of me would enjoy it. He not only put himself at the top of this list but also propelled the other guys in the match along with him.

2. The New Day (LM: 1)
The New Day still rocks, and even though they are likely on their way to becoming good guys, I'm still excited for their future. Feuding with The League of Nations would build some interest, because no other tag team is a viable matchup until American Alpha comes up and takes down everything in their path.

3. Roman Reigns (LM: 6)
It is very hard to be objective with Roman Reigns. Either you follow the WWE's lead and are convinced he is the super savior that this generation needs, or you're a smark who decides that WWE can't tell them who to like and only focus on what he doesn't do well. I'm somewhere in the middle, and closer to the former than the latter. Roman Reigns is fun to watch in his matches, and he continues to have really good matches on big stages. I'd rather appreciate what he does well than what he doesn't.

4. Kevin Owens (LM: 4)
He won back his Intercontinental Title in about the most meaningless way possible, and then he wrestled Dolph Ziggler for the 35th time this month. I still find him to be consistently entertaining, and I am hoping the WWE utilizes him to the full extent for WrestleMania.

5. Shane McMahon (LM: Unranked)
I was never a big Shane O'Mac fan. He's fine and definitely the best wrestler of the McMahons, but he was by no means a good wrestler, just someone willing to take bumps, which, admittedly, is more than I'm willing to do. And I can't say that I'm excited for his match at WrestleMania, because he's kind of old, and The Undertaker is even older. With all that being said, he made a hell of an impact in his first segment, and it did raise my interest in anything the McMahons are doing. I think the play here is that Shane McMahon puts up a good fight with Taker, and after Taker tombstones him 1-3 times, Taker lies on his back and drags Shane over him to purposely lose. That's the way you have to play this, right?

6. Sasha Banks (LM: 2)
She's still great. She'll put on an entertaining match with Becky Lynch next month before moving on to face Charlotte at WrestleMania. They may actually keep my interest in a two-month build, as Sasha was continually building towards things with her feud with Team BAD, followed by taking on Becky Lynch to prep for a match for the title. That is nice work.

7. Dean Ambrose (LM: 7)
Dean Ambrose vs. Brock Lesnar actually has me excited. Sure, it's more for the latter than the former, but still, I'm excited. Ambrose has been on fire these past two months where his wackiness hasn't just been stupidity, but he's more of a crazy person who won't quit. I could get behind that. Still, we'll keep him around here and stay cautiously optimistic.

8. Charlotte Flair (LM: 9)
Sure, she's no Sasha Banks, but she is an effective women's champion. She is the biggest, strongest, most athletic Diva they have, so it's very easy for her to be disliked. Her speaking is a little rough, but she still has the highest potential to do something insane with her athleticism, and she continues to be solid. This is good.

9. Bo Dallas (LM: 5, as member of Social Outcasts)
Bo Dallas breaks into his own this month, as he is always the highlight of the Social Outcasts. Sure, what they're doing is still essentially meaningless, but it's worth paying attention to which gives him an advantage over most of the roster.

10. Dolph Ziggler (LM: 8)
The WWE is bound and determined to make me less and less excited about Dolph Ziggler, but I'm not ready to quit him yet. He had some really good matches with Kevin Owens, but it just wore me down seeing it every week.

And that wraps up this month. Falling off the list is Rusev (LM: 3) who didn't do anything of note, and Sami Zayn (LM: 10) who disappeared after his Royal Rumble appearance. 

Monday, February 1, 2016

The 10 Best Things in the WWE: January 2016

I am 31 years old; I still watch pro wrestling. This is never a point in my favor, but I'm basically an addict at this point. It's not always good; in fact, it's usually not all that good, but when it is good, it can be one of the greatest things produces on television, and that's what I keep holding on to. Still, most of it sucks, but it's easy to focus in the negative; instead, I want to focus on the positive, so here are the ten best things in the WWE this past month (Note: I will only focus on the main roster, as nearly everything about NXT is great).

1. The New Day 
No self-respecting list could start with anything but The New Day. They're amazing. Just hearing them do their intro immediately puts a giant smile on my face, as I know I am about to feel real emotions and true love for a part of the WWE product. They have shown that they can hold their own with any wrestler that has ever been on the roster on the mic, and their work speaking should not overshadow their work in the ring, as Kofi and Big E complement each other incredibly well. I never thought I would be a huge Xavier Woods fan, but I am a huge Xavier Woods fan as the man has learned his niche and is incredibly entertaining without being totally distracting. New...Day Rocks.

2. Sasha Banks  
Just seeing Sasha Banks start walking out at the Royal Rumble overfilled my heart with joy. Sasha is the best female wrestler they have, and even though the talent has increased a ton with the Divas Revolution, it's still not all that close. She compels the crowd to the point that anytime there is a Divas match without Banks, everyone is wondering, "Where's Sasha?" She's got a lot going on right now as she's taking on Becky, wants to challenge Charlotte and is creating a riff between herself and Team BAD. The good news is that we won't have to wonder where Sasha is for the foreseeable future.

3. Rusev 
This is a man who speaks multiple languages, but did he learn these skills with an easy upbringing? No, he had to throw kids off the school bus, so there was enough room for him so he could go to school and learn. If you can get past the fact that he has an accent, you will learn that he is maybe the second most creative speaker in the entire company. He is my hero; he is your hero; he is even Putin's hero. All hail Rusev.

4. Kevin Owens 
He is consistently entertaining in and out of the ring, which makes him a rarity in the WWE right now. He's proof that a guy who is successful in a variety of organizations all over the country can also find success in the WWE. He hadn't debuted in NXT at this point last year, and now he is probably the likely opponent for Undertaker at WrestleMania, and is totally deserving of that opportunity.

5. The Social Outcasts 
This is mostly due to Bo Rida, who spit hot rhymes at Flo Rida and basically destroyed him in a rap battle that was designed for Bo to lose, but he BOlieved, and it was phenomenal. But at least they are doing something with those guys, and because they don't matter, they have freedom to do absolutely anything, which gives them more room to do something that truly stands out.

6. Roman Reigns 
I know everybody wants to shit on Roman Reigns, because. DURR the WWE can't tell me who to like, but just disliking the guys that WWE wants to push to prove how smart you are isn't all that productive either. Is he entertaining on the mic? No, not really, but he has been putting on good matches for a while, and objectively, he is pretty cool. He's a freakin' Samoan in SWAT gear. That's cool.

7. Dean Ambrose 
I am what you would call a Dean Ambrose hater, but that match at Royal Rumble was awesome, and that alone can put him on this list. Ambrose is not a guy who is made to appeal to me, but I can still understand some of the appeal, and he's fine, just not one of my favorites.

8. Dolph Ziggler 
He's still good in the ring, but it's tough to get too excited for him when you know that nothing that he is going to do will matter AT ALL. 

9. Ric and Charlotte Flair 
It's not the best Ric Flair. Hell, it's not the best Charlotte Flair, but I'm still interested when they're on TV, and that is way more than I can say for most of the Divas division. Becky Lynch does deserve some credit here, but not quite enough to include a third Diva in the Top 10.

10. Sami Zayn 
Yeah, this is kind of cheating, but he did make one appearance, so that does make him eligible. His one appearance was fun where they reminded everyone that Zayn and Owens still hate each other, but I doubt we will be seeing him on these rankings again anytime soon. 

These rankings are absolutely subjective, so feel free to let me know what I got wrong in the comments.

Friday, February 28, 2014

Cesaro vs. Zayn IV Was The Match Both Guys Needed

No real introduction needed. Cesaro/Zayn IV was an incredible match on NXT ArRIVAL, and you should sign up for the WWE Network to watch it. Now onto why this match was so great.

Number one, it was an awesome match. It was a far different match than their 2-out-of-3 falls match, but it was right up there in quality.

Number two, it made sense. Going into the match, I thought Zayn was probably a slight favorite in my head, because he needed this match, and Cesaro was dismissing him as he knew he was better. That's almost always a recipe for the underdog triumphing, but in this case, the underdog didn't deserve to triumph. Since they had that match, Cesaro has turned into a monster who beat the WWE World Heavyweight Champion, Randy Orton, did serious damage in an Elimination Chamber, and nearly beat John Cena. Meanwhile, Sami Zayn's most notable matches are losing to Bo Dallas, barely beating Leo Kruger by rollup, and then getting beat by Adrian Neville.

Clearly, Cesaro is on the upswing, and Zayn has just been stagnating, and the match reflected that beautifully. In their last match, the offense was pretty even for both guys and Cesaro just barely edged him. In this match, Zayn got some offense, because he's still great, but Cesaro dominated the match. The perfect example of that was Zayn going for his dive through the ropes spinning DDT (which, if you haven't seen it, is just as awesome as it sounds). In the first match, he nails Cesaro with it, and it's phenomenal. Everybody is looking for that move to happen again, and Zayn is set up perfectly for it. He dives through the ropes to catch Cesaro, but instead Cesaro absolutely destroys him with a European uppercut. Right there, in that single move, it showed that Zayn is great, but Cesaro is better.

In the end, Zayn showed that he's one of the toughest guys out there when it comes to punishment, but Cesaro got to show that he was better. People who had never watched NXT before still get to see that Cesaro is on the rise and that this Sami Zayn character is super tough but not quite on the same level as the best guys on the main roster. That totally makes sense. Cesaro should win that match, and Zayn still looks great by being dynamic in the ring and tougher than nails. It wasn't as important that he lost, because a WWE crowd can get behind tough guys. Mankind was mostly known for taking insane beatings until he got over. Zayn isn't a big guy, so he's always going to be somewhat of an underdog, so if he has an insane ability to fight through pain, it's a much more important building block than a single win over Cesaro could be for him.

This is the match that both guys needed, and I loved every second of it. 

Tuesday, January 21, 2014

I Took My Wife To A WWE NXT House Show For Date Night

The nice thing about being married is that any excuse to get out of the house and do something together can be considered a date. My wife knows that I am not a romantic, so she has very low standards for a good time out. Her low expectations have been a boon for me. We have had two great date nights in the past few weeks, as a couple weeks ago, we went to the Orange Bowl. This past weekend, I took it to a whole new level, by taking my wrestling nerdery to a whole new level, and taking my wife for a night out at a WWE NXT house show.

The event took place at the Lakeland Armory, and when I walked in, I had mixed emotions. I was pumped, because there were only about 150 seats, so I knew my GA seats would be in the third row. I was a little disappointed, because the ceiling was so low that I knew there was not going to be any high flying maneuvers that night. Anyway, there was no alcohol served, so I decided to relive my high school days and pound some Mountain Dews while watching wrestling. I am a child.

We got there about a half hour before the show, which was right in time for the pre-show autograph signing with NXT superstars Jason Jordan and Mason Ryan. But then they announced a special guest appearance with Billy Gunn. Unfortunately, I forgot my Ass Man shirt at home, and since I was unable to get that signed, I really didn't care about getting autographs.

Then, I saw him. A real-life WWE (WCW, if you want to get technical) Superstar. One of my wrestling heroes. A man that has inspired my earliest West Coast Dance moves. That's right, it was Screamin' Norman Smiley.
He was across the crowd from me, so I made the choice to wait as surely he would work his way around closer, so I could thank the man for all of his influence on me. This was a huge mistake on my part, as he only popped out from behind the curtain for that single minute, and I never saw him again the rest of the night. I'm still mad at myself, because Norman Smiley is the best.

Never forget.

Anyway, back to the NXT show. I'll quickly break it down, match by match.

Devin Taylor introduced Slate Randall as our host. He seemed pretty good on the microphone, but that may have been just because he was alongside Devin Taylor, so the bar was not exactly set high. Anyway, he's a stereotypical cocky jerk, so I'll be interested to see his character on television.

The first match of the night was Aiden English vs. Colin Cassady. It wasn't a really solid match and probably my second favorite of the night. They worked well with each other, and it's just really fun to chant S-A-W-F-T SAAAAAAAAAWFT.

The next match was Sylvester LeFort and Marcus Louis vs. Mason Ryan and Jason Jordan who are tagging up, because they are muscular and their first names' rhyme. Before the match started, I told my wife to wait for the USA chants, because they were coming, despite Mason Ryan being Welsh. About three seconds later, Jason Jordan started the chants. I proudly chanted along, because America. Anyway, LeFort and Louis had a pretty funny chant thing they were doing that I couldn't totally make out the words, but I have a feeling I will be seeing it soon on NXT.

After that, it was Baron Corbin vs. CJ Parker, and I felt bad for both guys. I don't like CJ Parker, but shit, everybody else hates CJ Parker, and it is just a constant stream of people yelling at him about how badly he sucks. There were 7-year-old kids yelling at him about how much he sucks. This is a problem with NXT shows, because it is full of Smarks. Fans who love the bad guys and hate the good guys. I fall into this group, but I still try to cheer good guys and boo the bad guys, because that's the reaction that will actually help the wrestlers. I don't really need other wrestling fans to think I'm cool, but good for the people who need that sort of affirmation. His hippy gimmick does not make sense, and my wife brought up a really good point that his bright white go-go boots don't quite fit the hippy lifestyle. He should probably get some birkenstocks. Anyway, I also felt bad for Corbin, because he tried to be a heel, but Hitler would have trouble getting heat when facing CJ Parker. I just felt bad for everyone involved.

After that, there was an appearance from Sweet T, who immediately tried to become a heel again. Then Leo Kruger came out with his new gimmick, Adam Rose, and he now has a fat manager named Humphrey. They love to dance, but his accent makes it sound like Donce, and I have been chanting donce ever since. It's starting to wear down my wife. Honestly, this was the best match of the night, as they went back and forth and put on a really fun match for the crowd. I'm now a huge Adam Rose fan and despite the cool fans continually chanting Leo Kruger, I think this gimmick has way more potential to get him on the main roster. Also, hopefully Broadus and Sweet T become heels, because they need something to switch it up.

After intermission, they kicked it off with a Divas match with some redhead named Becky Lynch against Bayley. It was a little slow, but it was fine. Bayley was definitely a fan favorite despite my wife describing her as "softball girly looking."

Then it was Corey Graves vs. Troy McClane (I didn't catch the guy's last name, but that was the only Troy I found on the roster). There was an incredibly annoying fan who would not stop yelling. Corey Graves rightfully told her that nobody wanted to hear her, and became an instant fan favorite, because that lady was seriously the worst. Troy was going through his infomercial spiel, but the lady would not shut up, so I couldn't hear half of it. Since Corey Graves talked trash to that lady, he became my wife's favorite wrestler of the night. Most people either really like or really hate him, but I'm kind of blah on him. He's perfectly fine.

Finally, it was the main event between Adrian Neville and Bo Dallas. Bo seemed to phone in this match, and with the low ceilings, there wasn't much that Neville could really do. He did some flippy stuff, and Bo Dallas put on some decent offense, but they had a cheap pin from Dallas end the match, and it was a pretty anticlimactic ending to the night.

Overall, it was a fun night. There was some solid wrestling, and for $10, it's really tough to beat that value. I was disappointed that Tyler Breeze was not there, and I didn't really expect Sami Zayn to be there, so that wasn't much of a surprise. Still, there were a lot of good wrestlers, and even my wife had a good time.

But next time I am definitely getting that picture with Norman Smiley.

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

The 10 Brightest Futures in the WWE

For the first time in a long time, it seems the WWE has an influx of young talent making their way up the ranks. This is exciting in that all wrestlers eventually become stale. Of course, in the WWE, if you remove those old talents for a while, the staleness reverses and it becomes super exciting to see them again. This is why I am very excited about the possibility of Hulk Hogan back in the WWE. Although he appears to be an awful human being, he's got nostalgia on his side. Still, the WWE cannot depend on Hogan, Rock, and Undertaker comebacks to help them forever.

Notes:
1. Now, whether these guys are actually young is not important, but I did want to pick guys who have not quite established themselves. Fandango is Fandango forever, so he's not on the list. Antonio Cesaro is unlikely to be a Real American in a year so he is on the list.

2. I only included the top two guys on the NXT roster in terms of their place in NXT and not their future. This means I was unable to write about guys like Alexander Rusev, Aiden English, and Tyler Breeze.

Now onto the list:

10. Erick Rowan - He is a big bruiser, and the WWE can always use guys like that. He's a future tag champion, and has a shot at a lower-tier singles title. Still, he's kind of a poor man's version of the next guy on this list.

9. Luke Harper - Don't underestimate how awesome Luke Harper is in the ring. He's a large human being who does a great job at making what he does look like it hurts...a lot. His match a couple weeks ago on NXT against Kassius Ohno was tremendous, and it was so different than what the WWE usually produces in their matches. Since he brings something different than others in the WWE, I think he can definitely be a bruising singles champion down the line after a run with the tag titles.

8. Antonio Cesaro - I am an unabashed mark for Antonio Cesaro. I never fast forward through any of his matches, because he's so good that he can make any match entertaining. Pound for pound, there is nobody close to as strong as he is, which means he can toss around smaller guys and easily pick up the bigger guys. I hate putting him this low, but can he ever rise to the top tier? He has two things that oppose each other, and that is that he is foreign but awesome. I recognized early on that he was awesome, but now everybody is starting to come around on that front with The Giant Swing. He's getting cheered despite being a heel. And when was the last time a foreigner got a real push as a face? Sheamus is the closest thing they've done, and even he is from an English speaking country. The odds are stacked against him, but let us never forget this wonderful moment.

7. Bo Dallas - I love Bo Dallas in NXT. I am a huge BOliever. That being said, I can't believe I'm putting him higher than Cesaro. He's going to get a huge push when he gets up to the main show, and I'm guessing that he will win a Money in the Bank match in the next two years. Because of that, I wouldn't be surprised if he wasn't the first person on this list to hold a top tier title, but I only see his ceiling as the World Heavyweight Champion (not too shabby).

6. Bray Wyatt - Wyatt can be a poor man's Kane. He doesn't have that size, but he's a monster, and he can sell himself being a monster to an audience. He's going to laugh at pain, and that makes him a legitimate challenger to anyone.

5. Dean Ambrose - Probably my most controversial ranking. When The Shield came in, Ambrose seemed to be the guy with the brightest future of the trio, and I think he's going to be great. I could see him having a CM Punk like career, but I don't know if it's likely. This is still really good, as if I made him eligible, I think Dolph Ziggler would be right around this range.

4. Seth Rollins - Maybe a homer pick, but one of my thoughts while making this list is whether this guy could beat Cena. Out of the guys below Rollins on this list, I think Cesaro has the best chance, and that would be in a non-title match, because I do think Cena recognizes really great wrestling and wants to help out those guys who stand out. Rollins can beat Cena, because he brings something very different to the table in his offense. Another thing that helps him is that any moment that he and Daniel Bryan are in the ring together is absolutely awesome.

3. Big E Langston - He just got the Intercontinental Title, but bigger things are ahead for him. He used to do a five count in NXT where he pinned his opponents for five seconds instead of three, and it was awesome. Since they don't care about the IC title as much anymore, isn't this the perfect time to let Big E defend his title by pinning guys for five seconds? This gives the WWE a good guy who is a beast, and if he's pinning guys for five seconds for six months, it legitimizes a run at the top titles. Also on his side is that he is actually entertaining on Twitter, and he has shown his charisma in bursts. He might have the highest ceiling of anybody on this list.

2. Roman Reigns - He came in with the least hype out of any member from The Shield, but he has gotten so much better in such a short time that it's hard not to see his sky-high potential. He's the new Batista, and I don't see any way that he doesn't fulfill that role with the company. He's going to be a multiple time WWE Champion, and I don't see anybody else on this list that you can definitely say that about. He may not have the highest ceiling, but he is the surest bet to be a dominant top tier champion.

1. Sami Zayn - Before you shout me down for trying to be too much of a smark about this list, hear me out. Zayn can be the WWE's most valuable asset in that he can be a babyface that even the internet wrestling community loves. Everybody sees Cena as the new Hogan, but Cena's gimmick is what Hogan did in low level feuds. He makes dick jokes and calls people gay. Hogan loved to call people gay, but in real feuds, Hogan was just super positive about how Hulkamania could conquer all. That's what Zayn brings to the table. He just states things matter-of-factly, and he believes that he's going to overcome everything. He reminds me of GSP in that he is just a super polite dude who is incredibly talented at what he does. Usually, the internet wrestling community would hate something like this, but he's so good in the ring that it's impossible to not get behind him. The WWE has always focused on large muscular guys as their lead dogs, but they may finally be ready to change that. The UFC's biggest star is GSP, and boxing's stars are Floyd Mayweather Jr. and Manny Pacquiao. You no longer need the larger than life guys to carry the sport, and I think Zayn has what it takes to rise to the top. He's going to be a star, and if done correctly, he could be the face of the WWE.

Friday, October 25, 2013

Please Start Watching NXT

Please start watching NXT. You can watch it for free on Hulu. I notice the episodes on Thursday mornings, but maybe they come out earlier than that. NXT is the best show the WWE produces. It is made up of wrestlers you have likely never seen before (unless you actually like independent wrestling, which very few people are aware of), and it has appearances by guys on WWE's main roster. It's awesome. The storylines make sense, and the matches are way better than Raw (excluding matches from The Shield, Ziggler, Cesaro, Daniel Bryan, and honestly, Randy Orton lately). I can't tell enough people about Antonio Cesaro vs. Sami Zayn in a 2 out of 3 falls match from a couple months ago. Click on this, go to right after the second to last commercial break (it's about 19 minutes left) and watch the match of the year. Seriously, the only that isn't awesome about this match is Alex Riley on commentary. Sami Zayn has followed this up by having awesome matches with Jack Swagger, El Local, and Bo Dallas. If you start watching NXT, Sami Zayn will become one of your five favorite wrestlers.

Outside of Sami Zayn matches, which are all awesome, the other best thing about NXT is Bo Dallas. That's right; I'm a Boliever. This is one of the greatest gimmick alterations the WWE has ever performed. Bo Dallas was basically John Cena where he was a good guy who was always positive and people despised him for it. The beauty of NXT is it is almost entirely made of the snarky WWE fans (I am one of these people). What Bo Dallas initially did was try to ignore things, but now he has become a delusional character who hears boos as "Bos," and basically everything he says now is brilliant. He is now the guy that everybody wants to punch in the face, and I love him for it.

The worst thing in the WWE is CJ Parker. He is a hippie who doesn't quite understand how to be a hippie and snaps in and out of character with no rhyme or reason. But that's the beauty of NXT, everyone that you feel should be hated is actually hated. Everything about CJ Parker is geared to get a positive reaction, but everyone who goes to NXT shows hates CJ Parker.

He's feuding with Tyler Breeze, who is Wrestling Zoolander. I see I have piqued your interests. Enjoy this video:

Yeah, he constantly takes selfies, and he's just a really fun character. He also beats CJ Parker all the time which is also very enjoyable.

Speaking of ridiculous things that make me happy, Enzo Amore and Big Cass are also fantastic. I am working on memorizing this speech for every job interview that I have:


This is one of my favorite promos of the year:

I cannot wait to tell somebody that they don't eat hard tacos, because they are S-A-W-F-T SAWFT!

And there is also Renee Young who has started showing up on the big shows but is even more wonderful on NXT. She does commentary occasionally and the only one who can keep up with her is William Regal. She could easily be to wrestling what Doris Burke is to basketball, which makes her the opposite of what Pam Ward is to college football. Also, she's pretty easy on the eyes as well.

I could easily keep going on this, but I really want people to start sharing in my love of NXT. Right now, all I have are the weekly recaps from Brandon Stroud on Uproxx (which are excellent). So please start watching, and I will gladly share thoughts on Aden English, Alexander Rusev, Kassius Ohno, Mojo Rawley (Stay Hype), and anybody else.

NXT is the best. Please start watching it.